A personal blog by a graying (mostly Anglo with light African-American roots) gay left leaning liberal progressive married college-educated Buddhist Baha'i BBC/NPR-listening Professor Emeritus now following the Dharma in Minas Gerais, Brasil.
You
and I don’t manifest in the universe as meaning, we manifest as living
human beings. We’re not here to represent something else. We’re here in
our own right. A human being, or a garden hoe for that matter, is
complete in itself.
My own strategy is to keep cultivating the witness, that part of me that
notices how I’m doing it—cultivate the quiet place in me that watches
the process of needing approval, of the smile on the face, of the false
humility, of all the horrible creepy little psychological things that
are just my humanity. And watching them occur again and again and again.
There
is far more love available to us in any given moment than we might be
aware. And there is much, much more love in our hearts than we as adults
have been conditioned to believe is appropriate to express.
To truly connect with other human beings, we must dare to present ourselves in ways that depict the true variety and complexity of our human experience. Without honesty there is no real bond between us, and without connection, nothing else really matters.
At some point awakening begins. The awakening happens with trauma or it
happens when somebody you love dies. In sexuality you transcend
separateness. It can be drugs, it can be meditation, it can be a hymn,
it can be a leaf falling, it can be lying under the stars, it can be
trying to solve a problem where your mind gets so one-pointed it goes
through the veil. Whatever it is, you open up into other planes of
consciousness that have been there in all of the splendor all the time.
Something remarkable happens when we go on sitting through all the but’s,
through all the thoughts, sensations, and emotions that we would so
like to oust. Gradually they begin to feel less alien, less like
obstacles in the way, rocks in the path. Our deepening awareness becomes
a kind of dew, falling on everything equally, allowing everything to
sparkle.
Don’t
worry about the future; don’t worry about the past. Stay right here.
Ultimately you get so that you can’t say that you’re going forward, you
can’t say that you’re going back, you can’t say that you’re staying in
place. There’s nothing to be attached to.
The
principle of karmic retribution—cause and effect—works with perfect
clarity right before our eyes. Even the smallest, most minor evils are
consumed in this fire, burning like dim stars in the night.
If
we really want to go beyond the surface of things to the deeply hidden,
actual experience of being alive (as spiritual practice encourages us
to do), we need imagination as an ally. The senses, reason, even our
moral and emotional faculties are not enough.
We inhabit a land of deep samskaras, karmic imprints that demand even deeper purification to dissipate. It is also a land where some of us are lucky to possess conditions for practice: sufficient food, good people, serious teachers and students, and, above all, a reason.
Two
important things about true giving: First, it requires some sacrifice
on the part of the giver. To give away something that one doesn’t need
is not dana. Second, the act must not be condescending but must
show respect to the one who receives the gift. In fact, one is grateful
to the recipient who makes the act of giving possible.
I am pretty sure I know now when my fall from grace began… It involved the NASA Space Program and a summer church camp.
Let me explain.
From the very beginning, the space launches were very much part of my psyche - and still are.
In those days the world stopped every time an astronaut was sent into space. Like most kids my age, I begged my parents to buy me the plastic models of each rocket and spent countless hours in my bedroom gluing pieces together and patently applying paint and decals to each model... Mercury, Gemini and then a huge almost 1m high Saturn V, with a tiny little LM that you could detach and connect to the Apollo spaceship. Later I made Enterprises and Jupiter spaceships to mess around with in my own little universe. When I left the USA, I still had that Saturn V in a box, it went to the estate sale, I hope someone is taking great care of it.
It was an age of promise with a few air raid drills (mostly 2nd and 3rd grade) in between. Moonshots, atomic menace, giant monsters on the 4 o´clock KTVU after school movie. Our games on long summer evenings with kids on the block were hide n seek plus duck n cover.
In 6th grade my family uprooted us from San José and moved to my father´s boyhood town of Grants Pass, Oregon. It was my first experience with travel, adventure and new friends, new beginnings. We were closer to Grandmother, Aunts and Uncles on the ranch in Northern California, and soon my parents would send my sister and I on the Greyhound for long weekends…
Neighbors got new tv´s, big things in fancy consoles – with hi fidelity record players with the TV in front. Once, a neighbor invited everyone over to see the Wizard of Oz in color. My students and my own kids think I am crazy, but it WAS a big deal.
So it was that Mrs. Olsen, who lived next door and brought us her homemade Swedish pastries every Saturday morning, invited us to watch the launch of Apollo 11 with her and on her TV. Though it was 50 years ago today, I remember sitting on the rug and counting down with almost everyone in the world as the rocket motors engaged and the thing took off. Everyone was proud and listened to every last communication, I had followed every step of the program since it began, I was a nerd, and this was religious. Soon we were going to have moon and Mars bases. 2001 had come out, and I was going to work in space for sure!
By accident, I was headed to a Church Camp, the next day or so.
I was so anxious to see them land, and a couple of us snuck up to the camp counselor´s house to look in the window. Yet the owners of the camp shooed us away from their window while watching the landing themselves.
And, that was the beginning of the end of my Christianity.
To this very day, I can´t for the life of me understand why the reverend couldn´t have moved his tv to the window of his house and allowed all off us to watch something so massively mind-bendingly world changing. The reverend could have used that as topic for his evening campfire sermons and had me forever in his congregation. Nope.
That week away, though was also the first time I developed a crush on a guy, a kid from Medford, dark Italian features… don´t remember his name. He looked great in his swimsuit, and me a gangly skinny kid he invited me with two girls he knew to make out in one of the abandoned cabins. He and his girl on one bed, me the other on another bed. Nothing more than kissing, I wouldn´t have known n what to do anyway at that stage. I remember that the young lady and I got shushed by the other couple, as were giggling hysterically with fear that our braces would get caught. Nothing really happened, but it was my first make out session, and also my wondering began as to what was so great about it. I mean I liked girls as people, still do, the other stuff not so much. In those days no one knew anything about LGBTQ anything.
So it was that 50 years ago my first questioning of organized religion and sexuality happened (it wasn´t until 25 or so years later, a series of uncomfortable relationships with good women, trying to like heterosex while not knowing what was gay sex, marriage that ended in a train wreck with an extraordinary son) that I discovered what was bugging me.
So, both spiritually and sexually - a giant 30 story Saturn V rocket and its phallic representation and all - this is how and why I have such deep appreciation for NASA and for everything that is good in my life.
Freud explica tudo...
P.S. just as I was shutting down my computer I heard whisps of the Blue Danube playing somewhere...
Mindful
consumption requires us to pay attention to the whole multitude of
causes and effects that result from our lives as consumers. It asks us
to learn about the issues, inform ourselves, and adjust our behavior
accordingly.
—Interview with Allan Hunt Badiner by Peter Alsop, “Spending Wisely”
Consciousness exists on two levels: as seeds and as manifestations of these seeds. Suppose we have a seed of anger in us. When conditions are favorable, that seed may manifest as a zone of energy called anger. It is burning, and it makes us suffer a lot. It is very difficult for us to be joyful at the moment the seed of anger manifests. Every time a seed has an occasion to manifest itself, it produces new seeds of the same kind. If we are angry for five minutes, new seeds of anger are produced and deposited in the soil of our unconscious mind during those five minutes. That is why we have to be careful in selecting the kind of life we lead and the emotions we express. When I smile, the seeds of smiling and joy have come up. As long as they manifest, new seeds of smiling and joy are planted. But if I don’t practice smiling for a number of years, that seed will weaken, and I may not be able to smile anymore.
The interesting question is, "How do you put yourself in a position so that you can allow ‘what is’ to be?" The enemy turns out to be the creation of mind. Because when you are just in the moment, doing what you are doing, there is no fear. The fear is when you stand back to think about it. The fear is not in the actions. The fear is in the thought about the actions.
Buddhism is a practice of penetrating and accepting the here and now—not only the bliss of meditation, but the irritations of mundane human interaction and the pain in the morning paper. Just as the lotus needs muddy water to live, the pain of the world can inspire compassionate and effective action.
Emptiness refers to the absence of something that, for some reason, one expects to find—as when we say a glass, normally used to hold liquids, is empty even though it is full of air. The point is not that there is nothing there at all, but rather that what is there differs from your expectations.
Without
the feeling of separation from the rest of the world, we lose the need
to strain and stress to be better, more clever, or more accomplished. We
can start to just be. That’s all there is to it.
The Buteyko method or Buteyko Breathing Technique is a form of complementary or alternative physical therapy that proposes the use of breathing exercises as a treatment for asthma as well as other conditions.
The method takes its name from Ukrainian doctor Konstantin Pavlovich Buteyko, who first formulated its principles during the 1950s. This method is based on the assumption that numerous medical conditions, including asthma, are caused by chronically increased respiratory rate or deeper breathing (hyperventilation). However, this theory is not widely supported in the medical community due to the lack of evidence supporting either the theory behind the method or that it works in practice. This method purportedly retrains the breathing pattern through chronic repetitive breathing exercises to correct the hyperventilation, which, according to the method's proponents, will therefore treat or cure asthma as well as any other conditions purportedly caused by hyperventilation. At the core of the Buteyko method is a series of reduced-breathing exercises that focus on nasal-breathing, breath-holding and relaxation.
Research into the use of the Buteyko method has focused almost exclusively on the treatment of asthma, and have had methodological problems. Studies have not found objective measures to support its use such as improvement in lung function, though there are results showing it may improve subjective measures such as asthma symptoms and quality of life. Reviews of this medical literature have come to different conclusions about the strength of evidence supporting the Buteyko method, with some literature saying the evidence does not support its use, while others have concluded the evidence is enough to consider qualified support. The literature that supports considering its use note the Buteyko method should be used with traditional therapies (and not in place of mainstream treatment) and is unlikely to affect the underlying cause of asthma. There is no support for the use of the Buteyko method in other diseases, such as diabetes mellitus or any of the over 150 diseases supporters of this method claim to treat.
To
see clearly—to perceive things as they are—we must break the chain
between the percept and the concept. This break comes after the senses
connect with the object of perception, but before the great flywheel of
mental habit boxes that perception in stale cubbyholes of thoughts and
feelings.
Shamatha meditation—mindfulness or concentration—is the foundation
of Buddhist practice. Lama Rod Owens teaches us a version from the
Vajrayana tradition.
Illustration by Carole Henaff.
Shamatha means “peaceful abiding” or “tranquility.” Also called mindfulness or concentration meditation, shamatha is an important introductory practice that leads to the practice of vipashyana, or insight meditation.
The purpose of shamatha meditation is to stabilize the mind by cultivating a steady awareness of the object of meditation. The traditional practice of shamatha uses different kinds of supports or anchors for our practice. Eventually, this leads to practicing without supports and meditating on emptiness itself in an open awareness. For this particular practice, the instructions will be for shamatha meditation using the breath as the focus of our practice.
Shamatha mediation allows us to experience our mind as it is. When we practice shamatha, we are able to see that our mind is full of thoughts, some conducive to our happiness and further realization, and others not. It is not extraordinary that our minds are full of thoughts, and it is important to understand that it is natural to have so much happening in the mind. Over time, practicing shamatha meditation calms our thoughts and emotions. We experience tranquility of mind and calmly abide with our thoughts as they are. Eventually, this leads to a decrease in unhelpful thoughts.
When we experience stable awareness, we are then ready to practice vipashyana, in which we develop insight into what “mind” is by investigating the nature of thoughts themselves. In the Vajrayana tradition of Buddhism, the ultimate goal is to practice calm abiding and insight in union, which opens the door to realizing the true nature of mind.
Traditionally, shamatha practice is taught through instructions on the physical body and then looking at the meditation instructions themselves.
The Seven-Point Posture
The seven-point posture of Vairochana is an ancient set of posture points that are said to align the physical body with our energetic body. The posture has been practiced for thousands of years by Hindu and Buddhist yogis. The seven points are:
Sit cross-legged.
Hands in lap or on knees.
Have a straight back.
Widen the shoulders to open the heart center.
Lower the chin.
Open mouth slightly with the tongue resting on the roof of the mouth.
Eyes open, gazing about four finger widths past the tip of nose.
A Body-Sensitive Posture
We all have different bodies and capabilities. It is important to adjust this demanding traditional posture to meet the needs of our own bodies, and not struggle to adapt our bodies to the posture. What is most important in terms of body posture is keeping the back and spine as straight as possible and remaining comfortable. So the seven points of a more body-sensitive posture could be:
Sit on a cushion or a chair, stand, or lie down.
Arrange your hands in any way that is comfortable.
Hold your back as straight as possible.
Keep your shoulders relaxed and chest open.
Hold your head at whatever level is comfortable.
Keep your lower jaw slightly open.
Keep the eyes closed or open.
The Meditation
There are many kinds of breath meditations. Some have been written down, while others have only been transmitted orally from teacher to student. The following is a basic breath meditation from the Vajrayana tradition:
Adjust the body into a comfortable position, and start the practice by becoming aware of your breath. Notice the inhalation and exhalation.
As you notice the breath, continue to let go of thoughts as they arise. Each time you are distracted by clinging to a thought, return to the breath. Keep doing this over and over again.
Eventually, as you exhale, become aware of your breath escaping and dissolving into space. Experience the same thing with the inhalation.
Slowing down, begin to allow your awareness to mix into open space with the breath on both the inhale and exhale.
To deepen the practice, begin to hold the breath after the inhalation for a few seconds before exhaling. By doing this, you are splitting the breath into three parts: inhalation, holding, and exhalation. Keep doing this.
As you inhale, begin to chant om to yourself. As you hold, chant ah. As you exhale, chant hung. Chanting these sacred syllables helps to further support awareness and is believed to purify our minds.
As you continue with exhalation, relax more. Continue awareness practice, letting go of thoughts and returning to the breath. Do this for as long as you can.
Consider
the possibility, and I am only saying consider the possibility, that
maybe nothing is unforgivable. Maybe there is a way to find forgiveness
even for what we have believed for so long to be unforgivable. Explore
this mindfully.
Working to accept death does not exclude efforts to heal the body. In other words, you can go and swim with the dolphins, have chemotherapy or radiation, or whatever, if simultaneously you are also working on death. So that you can keep the balance even. ‘Ah, death. Ah, life.’ That’s the optimum place. Not, ‘I wish for death’ or, ‘I’m going towards death.’ Also not, ‘I must have life’ or, ‘I can’t possibly have death.’ Because it’s the aversion and attraction that are the root of the suffering which turns into a problem at the moment of death.
Paper Cranes to Fort Sill – In Solidarity with Detailed Asylum Seekers
9 de jul de 2019 —
Dream Action Oklahoma (affiliated with United We Dream, the nation’s largest immigration youth-led network) is organizing a coalition of groups in Oklahoma for a large peaceful protest at Fort Sill on Saturday, July 20, 2019.
This past March, Tsuru for Solidarity, a direct action, nonviolent project of allied organizations within the Japanese American community, gathered in Crystal City, Oklahoma in collaboration with pilgrims from allied national organizations and networks. Crystal City, a former WWII internment camp in Texas, housed over 2,000 persons of Japanese ancestry. The gathering was to protest conditions at the nearby South Texas Family Residential Center in Dilley, Texas. 30,000 tsuru(origami cranes) were strung on the fences surrounding the detention center to demonstrate solidarity with those detained, including unaccompanied children separated from their families.
Last month, the Dept. of Health and Human Services announced that up to 1,400 unaccompanied migrant children would be transferred from Texas to Fort Sill, Oklahoma—another former WWII internment camp that held 700 persons of Japanese ancestry, including 90 Buddhist priests. Tsuru for Solidarity has been invited to participate and a Buddhist memorial service will be part of the day’s events.
Fort Sill, a military site, is a historic concentration camp that was used to imprison indigenous people forcibly removed from their lands. It is a place where native children were forcibly taken from their families and placed in re-education schools. It is a site where over 700 American men from the Japanese American community, including 90 Buddhist monks, were imprisoned during WWII.
Concentration camps are used to indefinitely detain minority groups in violation of human and civil rights and without due process. Fort Sill is being prepared to once again become a concentration camp. Concentration camps are now being used across the U.S. on a scale not seen since the WWII incarceration of Japanese Americans.
It's time for us to reclaim our moral center and our human commitment to one another. We are interconnected. What happens to one of us affects all of us. Speak out, show up, and get involved.
Yael Shy on how to bring mindfulness into your digital life.
The
key to mindful living “off the cushion” is building in a pause to check
in with our intention, our body, and our heart before we reach for our
favorite distractions. Nowhere is this more palpable and powerful than
in our relationships to our devices. When do you reach for your phone?
When do you click on social media sites? How do you feel right before
heading to your page on the site? What happens in your mind while
scrolling or posting? How do you feel afterward?
I invented a new practice for myself recently. Here’s the instruction: don’t look at your phone.
That’s what I tell myself when I feel myself start to get restless.
Waiting for the elevator. Waking up in the morning. Standing alone at a
party.
And it doesn’t mean Never look at your phone. There are many
moments throughout the day when it’s reasonable to do so. But I often
look at my phone by default, even when there’s no reason to. Or, worse, I
look at it because I’m avoiding something uncomfortable — like a
squishy emotion.
When I try this new practice of not looking at my phone, I discover a
lot. Sometimes, choosing not to look at my phone reminds me that there’s
something I’m avoiding. Other times, it reminds me to relax and enjoy
myself. And other times still, it prompts me to ask: what am I using
this phone for?
Most of us have smartphones — literal supercomputers strapped to our hips. How are we using them? How are they using us? I find that when I start asking these questions, this object of distraction starts to become an object of meditation.
Maybe
the first rule we should begin with, if we want meditation to be in our
life for a long time, is: Don’t make a rigid structure and then
chastise ourselves when we don’t live up to it. Better to keep a limber
mind and develop a tenderness toward existence.
The truth is everywhere. Wherever you are, it’s right where you are, when you can see it. And you can see it through whatever vehicle you are working with, you can free yourself from certain attachments that keep you from seeing it. The scientist doesn’t stop being a scientist, nor anybody stop being anything. You find how to do the things to yourself which allow you to find truth where you are at the moment. I’d say we never find out anything new, we just remember it.
In
trying to deny that things are always changing, we lose our sense of
the sacredness of life. It’s easy to forget that life and death are part
of the natural scheme of things, intrinsic to our lives in an eternally
shifting universe.
On the absolute level, our nature is buddha, we are the deity. But unaware of this, we’re bound by relative truth. In order to make the leap to the realization of our absolute nature, we have to walk on our relative feet, on a relative path.
Many's the time I've been mistaken And many times confused Yes, and often felt forsaken And certainly misused But I'm all right, I'm all right I'm just weary to my bones Still, you don't expect to be Bright and bon vivant So far away from home, so far away from home
And I don't know a soul who's not been battered I don't have a friend who feels at ease I don't know a dream that's not been shattered or driven to its knees But it's all right, it's all right We've lived so well so long Still, when I think of the road we're traveling on I wonder what went wrong I can't help it, I wonder what went wrong
And I dreamed I was dying And I dreamed that my soul rose unexpectedly And looking back down at me Smiled reassuringly And I dreamed I was flying And high…
We come on the ship they call the Mayflower We come on the ship that sailed the moon We come in the age's most uncertain hour and sing an American tune But it's all right, it's all right You can't be forever blessed Still, tomorrow's going to be another working day And I'm trying to get some rest That's all I'm trying to get some rest
America
is a nation that is always dynamically evolving—a nation of becoming,
its composition and character constantly transformed by migrations from
many corners of the world, its promise made manifest not by an assertion
of a singular or supremacist racial and religious identity, but by the
recognition of the interconnected realities of a complex of peoples,
cultures, and religions that enrich everyone.
When you stand back far enough, all of your life experiences, independent of what they are, are all learning experiences. From a human point of view, you do your best to optimize pleasure, happiness, all the nice things in life. From your soul’s point of view you take what comes down the pike. So from the soul’s perspective, you work to get what you want and then if you don’t ‘ah, so, I’ll work with what I’ve got.’
Our
hearts and minds change from moment to moment, just as the clouds shift
in the evening sky as the sun goes down. Who are we to think we have
grasped the true nature of our souls?
Tonglen is a form of Buddhist practice from the “mind-training” (lojong) teachings given by the important 11th-century Indian master Atisha. An essential part of mind training is overcoming what’s referred to as “self-cherishing,” which in this context means clinging to a narrow, egotistical mindset.
Tonglen is one of the tools mind training offers to weaken our tendency to self-cherish. Literally “sending and taking,” tonglen refers to visualizing oneself breathing in (taking) the suffering of beings, then breathing out (sending) one’s own well-being to alleviate that suffering.
The simplest version of tonglen consists of first taking a moment to rest in the natural spaciousness of the mind, or to ground and settle yourself. You then picture the suffering in the world—you can also home in on a certain person in need or a certain circumstance—and breathe it into yourself in the form of thick, heavy black smoke that dissolves in your heart. Opening your heart to feelings of compassion, you then breathe out the suffering in the form of “white energy,” bringing goodness to those afflicted.
You can practice tonglen formally in this way; however, many find tonglen challenging, so it’s best to practice under the guidance of a teacher. You can also, as the American Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön suggests, practice “on the spot” when you are confronted with challenges in everyday life or are dealing with strong negative emotions.
Check out Pema Chödrön’s advice for practicing tonglen outside the meditation hall.
[Meditation]
has nothing to do with training in some sort of technical skill or
gaining crucial esoteric knowledge that cannot be attained any other
way. Nor has it anything to do with transcending the human condition. It
is about bringing forth positive qualities in us that will see us
living meaningful and dignified human lives.
Equanimity
is said to be an anchor. It protects you against the “worldly
winds”—pleasure and pain, praise and blame, gain and loss, and fame and
disrepute—by keeping you anchored so you’re not tossed about by those
winds.
One of the big traps we have in the West is our intelligence, because we want to know that we know. Freedom allows you to be wise, but you cannot know wisdom. You must be wisdom. When my guru wanted to put me down, he called me ‘clever.’ When he wanted to reward me, he would call me ‘simple.’ The intellect is a beautiful servant, but a terrible master. Intellect is the power tool of our separateness. The intuitive, compassionate heart is the doorway to our unity.
As
we transform our own experience and relationship to our realities, we
cannot help but affect those around us in radiating circles into the
larger culture. These moments of freedom and transformation begin to
change and elevate the consciousness and awareness of the world.
Jack Kornfield on the importance of contributing to activism with Buddhist practice and wisdom.
How
can you do this service work in the spirit of practice? As dharma
practitioners, the first task is to make your own heart a zone of peace.
Instead of becoming entangled in the pain or cynicism that exists
externally, you need to face your own fear, your own sufferings, and
transform them into compassion. Only then can you offer genuine help to
the outside world.