Friday, January 14, 2022

Via Dhamma Wheel | Right Living: Abstaining from Misbehaving Among Sensual Pleasures

 


RIGHT LIVING
Undertaking the Commitment to Abstain from Misbehaving Among Sensual Pleasures
Sensual misconduct is unhealthy. Refraining from sensual misconduct is healthy. (MN 9) Abandoning sensual misconduct, one abstains from misbehaving among sensual pleasures. (MN 41) One practices thus: "Others may engage in sensual misconduct, but I will abstain from sensual misconduct." (MN 8)

A person reflects thus: "If someone were to commit adultery with my partner, that would not be pleasing and agreeable to me. Now if I were to commit adultery with the partner of another, that would not be pleasing and agreeable to the other. How can I inflict on another what is displeasing and disagreeable to me?" Having reflected thus, one abstains from sexual misconduct, exhorts others to abstain from it, and speaks in praise of abstinence from it. (SN 55.7)
Reflection
The practical definition of the precept against sexual misbehavior is defined in the context of householder or layperson life as fidelity or honesty in relationships. When an intimate partnership (of any gender combination) involves a mutual promise of exclusivity, this is to be respected. Cheating involves causing hurt and not being truthful, both of which are inherently unhealthy and harmful.

Daily Practice
Relationships are a rich area for daily practice. This text invites us to explore the application of the Golden Rule in relationships, in both large and small ways. It emphasizes that a pledge of fidelity works both ways and that there are also countless minor instances of abuse of trust and integrity that can come under the gaze of awareness. Look to see if there is anything you do, however small, that you would not want your partner to do.

Tomorrow: Developing Unarisen Healthy States
One week from today: Abstaining from Intoxication

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