Wednesday, February 14, 2024

Via Daily Living from White Crane Institute // ST. VALENTINE

 

Noteworthy
The reliquary of St. Valentine in the Vatican
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ST. VALENTINE. No no no…Don’t jump to any conclusions. St. Valentine was not Gay, but neither did he have anything to do with the holiday for lovers that bears his name. That St. Valentine, one of the more boring Christian martyrs, is the patron saint of lovers is a mere fluke. You see, the Norman word galatin, meaning a lover, was often mispronounced valentin, and through a natural confusion of names, St. Valentine became associated with love.

Officially recognized by the Roman Catholic Church, St. Valentine is known to be a real person who died around A.D. 270. However, his true identity was questioned as early as A.D. 496 by Pope Gelasius I, who referred to the martyr and his acts as “being known only to God.”

One account from the 1400s describes Valentine as a temple priest who was beheaded near Rome by the emperor Claudius II for helping Christian couples wed. A different account claims Valentine was the Bishop of Terni, also martyred by Claudius II on the outskirts of Rome. Because of the similarities of these accounts, it’s thought they may refer to the same person. Enough confusion surrounds the true identity of St. Valentine that the Catholic Church discontinued liturgical veneration of him in 1969, though his name remains on its list of officially recognized saints.

There is lore that says he was sent to the prison as he was involved in the act of soldiers weddings who were not allowed to marry or mistreated in the Roman empire. Hmmmmmmmm....

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Gay Wisdom for Daily Living from White Crane Institute

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Via Ram Dass - Love Serve Remember Foundation // Words of Wisdom - February 14, 2024 💌 Inbox

 

I think in relationships, you create an environment with your own work on yourself, which you offer to another human being to use to grow in the way they need to grow. Parents are environments for their children, lovers are an environment for their partners. You keep working – you become the soil – moist and soft and receptive so the person can grow the way they need to grow, because how do you know how they should grow?

- Ram Dass

Via Dhamma Wheel | Right Speech: Refraining from Frivolous Speech

 



RIGHT SPEECH
Refraining from Frivolous Speech
Frivolous speech is unhealthy. Refraining from frivolous speech is healthy. (MN 9) Abandoning frivolous speech, one refrains from frivolous speech. One speaks at the right time, speaks only what is fact, and speaks about what is good. One speaks what is worthy of being overheard, words that are reasonable, moderate, and beneficial. (DN 1) One practices thus: "Others may speak frivolously, but I shall abstain from frivolous speech." (MN 8)

When a person commits an offense of some kind, you should not hurry to reprove them but rather consider whether or not to speak. If you will not be troubled, the other person will be hurt, and you can help them emerge from what is unhealthy and establish them in what is healthy—then it is proper to speak. It is a trifle that they will be hurt compared with the value of helping establish them in what is healthy. (MN 103)
Reflection
So many of our speech patterns are habitual and unfold automatically. The practice of right speech gives us an opportunity to notice this, because we are bringing greater awareness to the action of speaking. It also enables us to change our habitual patterns because it gives us time to respond differently. The ability to pause and reflect before responding is particularly important when in the presence of offensive speech.

Daily Practice
The next time you feel offended by something someone says to you, slow down enough to not react automatically and to take some time to consider whether or not to speak. Not every putdown requires a comeback. The critical factor in the analysis above is whether or not what you say will make a difference. It is okay to hurt someone’s feelings if you "can help them emerge from what is unhealthy" and get on a better track.

Tomorrow: Reflecting upon Social Action
One week from today: Refraining from False Speech

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Via Daily Dharma: Real Love is Innate

 

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Real Love is Innate

I see real love as the most fundamental of our innate capacities, never destroyed no matter what we might have gone through or might yet go through. It may be buried, obscured from view, hard to find, and hard to trust . . . but it is there.

Sharon Salzberg, “Real Love”


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