Refraining is not Enough
| April 4, 2014
Whenever we find fault with others,
whether through anger, contemptuous certainty, self-righteousness, or
gossip, it is often based in fear. We may not be aware of our fears, but
when we look deeply, we may discover the fear of rejection, loss of
control, of unworthiness, or the fear of disconnection. But refraining
alone is not enough—by itself it is just behavior modification—and it is
neither healing nor transformative. Only through uncovering and
consciously entering into the deep hole inside, welcoming the fear with
curiosity and compassion, can we ultimately reconnect with the basic
wholeness of our true nature.
—Ezra Bayda, “Gossip”
