Si amas de verdad, no pides nada a cambio. Si negocias amor justamente
es porque eres incapaz de amar. La negociación funciona así: ‘¿Lo que
quieres es atención? Está bien, te doy atención, pero tendrás que hacer
exactamente lo que yo quiero, como yo quiero'. Este es un juego nefasto
cuyo objetivo es hacer del otro un esclavo para atendertus necesidades y
expectativas. Esto genera codependencia, lo que implicadepender
de la miseria del otro para sentirse feliz. Necesitas hacer que el otro
se sienta débil para poder sentirte fuerte. De esta forma las
parejasquitan energía uno al otroy refuerzan la falsa idea de yo. Pagan
este precio exorbitante, que es la pérdida de la libertad, porque están
completamente dependientes. Y lo peor es que encima llaman a esoamor.”
Del libro “Amar y Ser Libre”
“When we truly love, we ask for nothing in return. When we try to bargain with love it is because we are not yet capable of truly loving. Negotiating with love looks like this: ‘Is it attention you want? Okay, I’ll give you attention, but you will have to do exactly what I want, in the way that I want it.’ This game’s objectiveis to make the other a slave in order to attend to our needs and expectations. This creates co-dependency and requires the other’s misery in order for us to feel happy. We need the other to feel weak in order for us to feel powerful. Subsequently, as partners, we suck energy from one another, reinforcing this false idea of self. We pay an exorbitant price: the loss of freedom.We become completely dependent on the other. Unfortunately, this is still what we call ‘love’.”
From the book To Love and Be Free
“When we truly love, we ask for nothing in return. When we try to bargain with love it is because we are not yet capable of truly loving. Negotiating with love looks like this: ‘Is it attention you want? Okay, I’ll give you attention, but you will have to do exactly what I want, in the way that I want it.’ This game’s objectiveis to make the other a slave in order to attend to our needs and expectations. This creates co-dependency and requires the other’s misery in order for us to feel happy. We need the other to feel weak in order for us to feel powerful. Subsequently, as partners, we suck energy from one another, reinforcing this false idea of self. We pay an exorbitant price: the loss of freedom.We become completely dependent on the other. Unfortunately, this is still what we call ‘love’.”
From the book To Love and Be Free
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