A personal blog by a graying (mostly Anglo with light African-American roots) gay left leaning liberal progressive married college-educated Buddhist Baha'i BBC/NPR-listening Professor Emeritus now following the Dharma in Minas Gerais, Brasil.
Wednesday, September 17, 2025
Via Ram Dass - Love Serve Remember Foundation \\\ Words of Wisdom - September 17, 2025 💠
Via White Crane Institute \\ RANDY P. CONNER, Ph.D.
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| This Day in Gay History | |||
September 17 | |||
1952 - RANDY P. CONNER, Ph.D., born on this date (d: 2022), was a gay spiritual seeker, activist, author, artist, and teacher. Conner received his B.A. and M.A. degrees in English literature/composition from the University of Texas at Austin. In the 1970s he taught the first gay and lesbian workshop at the Student Union there. His studies concentrated on the intersections of ethnicity, gender, sexuality, and pursuit of the sacred. Conner received his doctorate in humanities and religion in 2007 from the California Institute of Integral Studies in San Francisco. He taught at several colleges including Florida State University, the University of Texas at Austin, and the California Institute of Integral Studies. He was most recently Associate Professor of World Humanities at Moraine Valley Community College near Chicago where he created a successful state- and college-approved LGBTQ+ humanities course. Conner’s spiritual path was focused on LGBTQ+ spirit in history and culture, especially as related to European Neo-Pagan, Indigenous Native American and African Diasporic traditions. He was an initiate and practitioner of both Haitian Vodou and Reglade Ocho (Santeria), studying primarily with Mama Lola, a well-known practitioner of these African Diasporic traditions. He received his “Elekes” (spiritual beads for the orishas/deities) as a Santero in Cuba, later earning the title of Oungan. Also a practitioner of Neopaganism and Wicca, he studied metaphysics and psychic arts with Tama Diaghilev, and Wicca/Witchcraft with ecofeminist leader Starhawk. Conner also studied Tarot and mystical symbology with spiritual teacher and scholar Angeles Arrien. He became a Radical Faery in the 1980s and attended many gatherings over the years. As an activist for LGBTQ+ rights, Conner testified in the mid-1970s at the Texas State Legislature for inclusion of gay and lesbian student organizations on campuses for which he was fired from his graduate teaching position. After moving to the Bay Area in 1978, he became a member of Bay Area Gay Liberation, campaigned against the Proposition 6 Briggs initiative, and for social/political justice for the queer and people of color communities. He also co-curated with his husband, David Hatfield Sparks, the El Mundo Surdo poetry series at Small Press Traffic in Noe Valley, created by Gloria Anzaldúa, his "hermana espiritual," and participated in Mainstream Exiles organized by San Francisco trans-activist Tede Mathews. Conner was a contributor to several LGBTQ+ publications including the Advocate, the old San Francisco Sentinel and White Crane Journal. He also served as fiction editor for RFD magazine and taught a course in gay spirit at the Harvey Milk Institute in the mid-1990s. Among his many essays, articles, books, speeches, presentations, and other publications, several were nominated for Lambda Literary Awards, including the seminal Blossom of Bone: Reclaiming Connections between Homoeroticism and the Sacred (Harper San Francisco 1993); the Encyclopedia of Queer Myth, Symbol and Spirit (Cassell 1997) and Queering Creole Spiritual Traditions: Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Participation in African-Inspired Traditions in the Americas (Routledge 2004). In 2019, Conner published his five-volume study, The Pagan Heart of the West: Embodying Ancient Beliefs and Practices from Antiquity to Present (Oxford). An expanded, revised edition of the Encyclopedia, re-titled The LGBTQ+ Companion to Symbol, Mythology, Folklore, and Spirituality, is forthcoming from Equinox Publications (London). These many interests and projects he shared with his long-time companion/husband of forty-three years, David Hatfield Sparks. Conner went to ride with Charon to the Otherworld on May 5, 2022. He is also survived by their daughter Mariah. | ||
|8|O|8|O|8|O|8|O|8|O|8|O|8|O|8 Gay Wisdom for Daily Living from White Crane Institute "With the increasing commodification of gay news, views, and culture by powerful corporate interests, having a strong independent voice in our community is all the more important. White Crane is one of the last brave standouts in this bland new world... a triumph over the looming mediocrity of the mainstream Gay world." - Mark Thompson Exploring Gay Wisdom & Culture since 1989! |8|O|8|O|8|O|8|O|8|O|8|O|8|O|8 |
Via Daily Dharma: The End of Clinging
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Viaa Dhamma Wheel | Right Speech: Refraining from Harsh Speech
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Tuesday, September 16, 2025
Via LGBTQ Nation Newsletter \\ Avoid These 5 Mistakes When Starting Your Family-Building Journey
FAMILIES |
5 Common Mistakes LGBTQ+ Parents-to-Be Make (and How to Avoid Them) |
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The path to parenthood for LGBTQ+ people can feel overwhelming. Between choosing the right provider, navigating costs, and dealing with legal hurdles, it’s easy to make missteps early on that can add stress — or delay your journey altogether.
Here are five of the most common mistakes hopeful LGBTQ+ parents-to-be make when starting out.
1. Waiting too long to start. Between finances, medical appointments, mental health or social worker visits, and paperwork (so much paperwork!), family-building often takes more time than people expect. The earlier you begin learning, the better prepared you’ll be. Starting early gives you the flexibility to move at your own pace.
2. Not vetting providers for LGBTQ+ experience. Not all clinics, agencies, or adoption professionals are equally affirming — or equally skilled at supporting queer families, and that lack of expertise can create roadblocks. They need to be vetted for their passion for (and expertise in) LGBTQ+ family-building. Conducting due diligence and asking the right questions up front ensures you’ll have the right support team.
3. Overlooking the emotional side. Family-building isn’t just a medical or legal process. It’s emotional. Finding support for the ups and downs is key. While many mental health providers may be LGBTQ+ friendly, nobody will truly understand what you are going through like another member of the community, especially an LGBTQ+ therapist who has personal experience with family-building!
4. Focusing only on cost — not value. It’s tempting to go with the least expensive option, but in family building, cheaper can sometimes mean cutting corners. Prioritize transparency, trust, and a provider’s track record over price alone.
5. Trying to figure it all out alone. Endless searching can leave you overwhelmed with conflicting information — and a lot of it isn’t tailored to LGBTQ+ families. Google can’t tell you which providers are truly inclusive, or prepare you for the emotional and legal realities of your journey. Nothing can beat a trusted resource that provides everything you need in one affirming place.
That’s where GWK Academy comes in. We’re the first-of-its-kind learning platform and support network created specifically for all LGBTQ+ people pursuing parenthood across any family-building options. You’ll find step-by-step guides, trusted provider referrals, and one-on-one coaching — all for free.
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