A personal blog by a graying (mostly Anglo with light African-American roots) gay left leaning liberal progressive married college-educated Buddhist Baha'i BBC/NPR-listening Professor Emeritus now following the Dharma in Minas Gerais, Brasil.
Aging gives us a chance to learn to use the shadows in our life as vehicles for our awakening — and the longest shadow of all is death. How you relate to death is the key spiritual work of aging. And how you see death is a function of how much you identify with that which dies. Egos die. Souls don't die.
Frivolous speech is unhealthy. Refraining from frivolous speech is healthy. (MN 9) Abandoning frivolous speech, one refrains from frivolous speech. One speaks at the right time, speaks only what is fact, and speaks about what is good. One speaks what is worthy of being overheard, words that are reasonable, moderate, and beneficial. (DN 1) One practices thus: “Others may speak frivolously, but I shall abstain from frivolous speech.” (MN 8)
An authentic person is one who even unasked reveals their own faults—how much more so when asked. When asked, however, and obliged to reply to questions, one speaks of one’s own faults fully and in detail. (AN 4.73)
Reflection
The last time we looked at refraining from frivolous speech we focused on holding back from criticizing others. Now we look at the flip side of that—being willing to be forthcoming about your own faults. The idea here is not to put yourself down but to be honest with yourself. It is an example of speaking only what is fact and what is beneficial, since admitting your faults allows you to grow beyond them.
Daily Practice
This is a practice of humility and has to do with cultivating a humble attitude about yourself. It counteracts those qualities of mind that contribute to the inflation of the sense of self, such as pride and conceit, and helps moderate the tendency to aggrandize the self. You need not dwell on your faults, and it is okay to equally acknowledge your strengths, but simply stating both honestly is a form of right speech.
Tomorrow: Reflecting upon Social Action One week from today: Refraining from False Speech
Share your thoughts and join the conversation on social media #DhammaWheel
The pain of our own bodies, hearts, and minds and the pain in the world is not going away. It’s just a fact of life. We’re not going to outrun the pain, but we can learn to actually practice with mitigating that pain if that’s possible.
