RIGHT SPEECH
Refraining from Malicious Speech
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Malicious speech is
unhealthy. Refraining from malicious speech is healthy. (MN 9)
Abandoning malicious speech, one refrains from malicious speech. One
does not repeat there what one has heard here to the detriment of these,
or repeat here what he has heard there to the detriment of those. One
unites those who are divided, is a promoter of friendships, and speaks
words that promote concord. (DN 1) One practices thus: "Others may speak
maliciously, but I shall abstain from malicious speech." (MN 8)
When others address you, their speech may be connected with good or with
harm … One is to train thus: "My mind will be unaffected, and I shall
utter no bad words; I shall abide compassionate for their welfare, with a
mind of lovingkindness, without inner hate." (MN 21)
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Malice is the
desire to do harm, and when we look closely and honestly we may notice
that much of what we say is laced with this intention. One text calls a
dispute “stabbing one other with verbal daggers.” Here we are being
encouraged to receive the wound without striking back. It is ultimately
an expression of freedom from compulsion when you are able to say,
“Others may speak maliciously, but I choose not to.”
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Not being
provoked to malice by the malice of others is a difficult but important
practice. Try to do this in small ways and gradually build up to more
difficult situations. If someone slights you in some small way, practice
noticing this, understanding it as an aggressive verbal act and then
deliberately choosing to not be provoked by it into some form of
retaliation. Do this again and again, and you will gradually get the
hang of it.
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Tomorrow: Reflecting upon Verbal Action
One week from today: Refraining from Harsh Speech
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