RIGHT SPEECH
Refraining from Harsh Speech
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Harsh speech is unhealthy.
Refraining from harsh speech is healthy. (MN 9) Abandoning harsh speech,
one refrains from harsh speech. One speaks words that are gentle,
pleasing to the ear, and affectionate, words that go to the heart, are
courteous, and are agreeable to many. (DN 1) One practices thus: “Others
may speak harshly, but I shall abstain from harsh speech.” (MN 8)
When one says, “All those disengaged from the pursuit of
self-mortification have entered upon the right way,” one thus extols
some. But when one says instead, “The disengagement from the pursuit of
self-mortification is a state without suffering, and it is the right
way,” then one is not extolling anyone but simply stating the truth. (MN
139)
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The principle
we reviewed earlier about criticizing the negative actions of people
rather than criticizing them as people also applies in the positive
direction. It is better to extol, to praise, positive words and deeds
than to extol the person. While the negative comments lead to protective
defensive behaviors, the positive comments could result in an increase
of pride and conceit.
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Praising
someone for being a great person boosts their sense of self, and while
this may be a good thing in the case of the developing egos of
youngsters, it is not something encouraged for Buddhist practitioners.
By all means extol the value and benefit of benevolent words and deeds,
for example, but practice the habit of not feeding people’s view of
self, lest you contribute to their self-aggrandizement. Help people be
humble.
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Tomorrow: Reflecting upon Mental Action
One week from today: Refraining from Frivolous Speech
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