A personal blog by a graying (mostly Anglo with light African-American roots) gay left leaning liberal progressive married college-educated Buddhist Baha'i BBC/NPR-listening Professor Emeritus now following the Dharma in Minas Gerais, Brasil.
Saturday, July 1, 2017
Friday, June 30, 2017
Via Daily Dharma: The Beauty of Right Speech
The beauty of right speech is that we always have the opportunity to practice how we relate to others. The payoff? We become smarter about ourselves, more sensitive to our peers, and more careful in our actions.
—Krishnan Venkatesh, “How to Practice Right Speech Anywhere, Anytime and With Anyone”
—Krishnan Venkatesh, “How to Practice Right Speech Anywhere, Anytime and With Anyone”
Thursday, June 29, 2017
Via Utne: Free Your Mind: Practice Vipassana Meditation
Vipassana meditation is a widely used relaxation practice that can be done easily by beginners, with great results!
After years of heavy addiction, Chris Grosso found himself literally on his knees, utterly lost and broken. Grasping for life, he needed to find a new path, one that went beyond conventional religious or spiritual doctrine—one free of bullshit. Indie Spiritualist (Beyond Words Publishing, 2014) empowers readers to accept themselves as they are, in all their humanity and imperfect perfection. In this excerpt learn the basics of vipassana meditation, a simple relaxation practice that can be done by anyone and in any setting.
Vipassana Meditation
Besides being asked, “What’s an Indie Spiritualist?” the second most common question I’m typically asked is “What type of meditation do you practice?”While I personally practice many different types of meditation—never feeling like I have to stay within the confines of only one tradition—I typically respond with vipassana, as I’ve found it to be the most universally applicable form of meditation around. Any form of meditation that resonates with you—whether guided, mantra, movement, and so forth—will definitely be of benefit.
I adore meditation because there are countless ways to meditate, with no particular style being any better than another. It’s all about what resonates with you. You can find many free guided meditations online by searching Google or YouTube, as well as by visiting your local library. Most meditation practices are to spirituality what Bob Ross was to painting—very laid back and go with the flow. And while your practice may not provide you with happy little trees, it will over time create a greater sense of peace, clarity, and serenity in your life, and that’s sorta like happy little trees, right?
Through years of drug addiction, I did considerable damage to myself, resulting in heavy bouts of depression and anxiety. For years, I relied on antidepressant and anti-anxiety medications to keep me in a somewhat balanced state, but after cultivating a dedicated meditation practice I eventually found myself at a place where, under doctor supervision, I was able to taper off the medication and no longer needed it.
Let me make it perfectly clear, however, that there is absolutely nothing wrong with taking prescribed medication for conditions like anxiety, depression, and so forth. I recognize that they were very necessary in my life at that time, as I was very chemically off-balance. There is nothing unspiritual about taking prescribed medication when needed, because our own mental and emotional well-being must come first before we can truly help others.
Whether we are on medication or not, meditation practices will certainly help us to not only cultivate more calm in our lives, but also to handle things like stress, anxiety, and depression in gentler ways. For the benefit of those who are new to meditation, I’m providing these simple guided instructions for the practice of vipassana.
A Guided Vipassana Meditation
There’s no shortage of “spiritual positions” suggested for meditative practices, but really, as long as you keep your spine straight, without being overly tense or rigid in your posture, you’ll be fine. You can sit with your legs crossed in half or full lotus position, sit upright in a chair with your feet on the ground, or lie down flat on your back (before lying down, however, be mindful of whether or not you’re tired, as it can be easy to fall asleep during meditation).As far as mudra (hand) positions go, put them wherever feels right to you. You can place them in your lap, palms up, one on top of the other; you can place them palms down on your knees; or fuck it, you can even make those silly circle things with your fingers, which has become the quintessential consumer vision of what we’re supposed to look like while meditating. It really doesn’t matter, though. Whatever feels most comfortable for you is the right position. Once you’ve got the hands figured out, close your eyes.
Next, bring your awareness to your Buddha belly (or chiseled vegan abs), roughly two inches above your navel, along the vertical midline of your body. Remember that this is not an exact science, so just bring your awareness to somewhere in that area, wherever feels right for you. (Note: Bringing attention to the tip of your nose, just inside your nostrils, as you breathe in and out, is also an anchoring point in vipassana. If that feels more natural to you, go with it!)
As you bring your awareness to your belly, you’ll begin to notice that, as you breathe in, your abdomen expands, and as you breathe out it contracts. The movements of expanding and contracting are often referred to as “rising” and “falling,” and are used as anchoring points to focus on during practice.
As your abdomen expands, observe its motion from beginning to end. Then do the same as it contracts. It’s that simple. Your breath, and the rising and falling of your abdomen, happen naturally, with no conscious effort on your part, so as you bring your awareness to the rising and falling motions, they anchor you in the present moment. If you find you’re having difficulty perceiving the rising and falling movements, it may help to place your hand on your stomach to feel them more clearly.
It also helps to recognize that the rising and falling are actually separate movements. There is a moment, after the abdomen has expanded to its fullest, and just before it begins to contract, that it is completely still. Being vigilant in your awareness of this break point in the motion can be extremely helpful in keeping your concentration focused, as it keeps your awareness centered.
Via Daily Dharma: Dignity Is Yours
Because
human beings can deliberately choose to follow the dharma, we can
consciously awaken. This potential for enlightenment is the source of
self-worth and self-respect. Dignity is part of our karmic inheritance.
—Sallie Tisdale, “On Dignity”
—Sallie Tisdale, “On Dignity”
Wednesday, June 28, 2017
Via Ram Dass
I
began to see that my work was purification. It was getting my theme
straight, it was lightening up my attachments, getting out of living
such a complicated life, simplifying my life, relating to other human
beings, so that when I met another person, I found the place in them
where we are, and I didn’t get caught and lost in the melodrama of our relationships.
- Ram Dass -
Via Daily Dharma: The Awakened Heart
There’s
nothing as impoverished as the deeply unawakened heart; and nothing
enriches us more, and brings more life and meaningfulness, than the
awakened heart.
—Christina Feldman, “Doing, Being, and the Great In-Between”
—Christina Feldman, “Doing, Being, and the Great In-Between”
Tuesday, June 27, 2017
Palestra: Budismo e suas Práticas no ocidente / salão nobre da escola minas Museu de Ciência e Técnica da Escola de Minas
The Buddha described his teaching as “going against the stream.” The unflinching light of mindful awareness reveals the extent to which we are tossed along in the stream of past conditioning and habit.
Buda descreveu o seu ensinamento como "indo contra o fluxo". A luz implacável da consciência consciente revela até que ponto somos lançados no fluxo dos condicionamentos e hábitos passados.
O que é uma Sangha? Uma Sangha é uma comunidade de amigos praticando o Dharma juntos de forma a fazer acontecer e manter a consciência. A essência da Sangha é consciência, entendimento, aceitação, harmonia e amor. Quando våocê não vê isto em uma comunidade, não é uma verdadeira Sangha e você deveria ter a coragem de dizer. Mas quando você encontra esses elementos presentes em uma comunidade, sabe que tem a felicidade e a sorte de estar em uma Sangha real.
Last night the Cambridge City Council passed a resolution honoring the Bicentenary of the birth of the Founder of the Baha'i Faith. Here is the text and a picture of the Council.
Last night the Cambridge City Council passed a resolution honoring the Bicentenary of the birth of the Founder of the Baha'i Faith. Here is the text and a picture of the Council.
WHEREAS: October 21-22, 2017 marks the 200th Anniversary of the Birth of Bahá’u’lláh, the founder of the Bahá’í Faith; and
WHEREAS: Bahá’u’lláh called for fellowship and collaboration among the followers of all religions, while religious hatred and fanaticism continue to fuel violence, tyranny, and terrorism; and
WHEREAS: Bahá’u’lláh affirmed the equality of women and men, while the oppression of women still holds back the progress of so many societies; and
WHEREAS: Bahá’u’lláh taught that humanity is one family and called for the elimination of racism and racial prejudice, while racism remains a persistent evil; and
WHEREAS: Bahá’u’lláh declared that universal education is required for societies to succeed, while universal access to education is still unattained; and
WHEREAS: Bahá’u’lláh called for limits on the extremes of poverty and wealth, while billions still live in destitution and a large portion of the world’s wealth is owned by a few elites; and
WHEREAS: Bahá’u’lláh urged the leaders of the world to abandon their nationalistic rivalries and create a system of collective security, while their failure to do this has caused two world wars, multiple other conflicts, and a massive global arms trade; and
WHEREAS: The wide gap between these ideals and the state of the world calls for people of all faiths and no faith to rise above narrow partisanship and work together for human understanding and peace; now therefore be it
RESOLVED: That the City of Cambridge, in recognition of the significance of this bicentenary, urges all citizens to work for the realization of the principles of peace, justice, and human solidarity promoted by Bahá’u’lláh.
Via Baha’i Story Project: A Baha’i Parent’s Epiphany Story Entry
(An unpublished essay written by a mom, in hopes that our family's experience will be of interest to other Baha'i families with a gay child, in supporting him or her in love and unity:)
May 30, 2012. It was an ordinary day in an ordinary place, when my
cell phone rang in the K-Mart parking lot. It was always a pleasure to
hear from our 28-year-old son, though on this occasion it was not clear
as to what was on his mind. I asked the usual “mom” question to draw
him out: “How’s your social life?” (The predictable answer was that he
was “talking to a girl,” but that she was not his “type.”)
Today, however, he replied in a voice heavy with resignation: “That’s a story for another day . . . .”
For some strange reason, I gently dared to ask: “Alex, are you . . . gay? In the uncomfortable, prolonged silence which followed, I steeled myself for the unexpected reply: “Yes,” he said in a breaking voice. “It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to say.” Though my world had just experienced a seismic event, nevertheless my heart immediately went out to our brave, youngest child—ever truthful, even when it was the hardest thing he had ever had to say.
During the remainder of that phone call, I learned everything I did not know about what it meant to be gay, as he patiently answered my many questions. My mental adjustment was almost instantaneous: our beloved son was now our beloved gay son. My emotional adjustment was just beginning.
Over the coming days, I searched my cerebral cortex for subtle clues that would point to homosexuality. Certainly our son was the picture of masculinity. But . . . yes—there was Alex’s lukewarm interest in an internet dating site to which my husband, with the best of intentions, had unwittingly subscribed on his behalf. And yes, there was the hint that most girls weren’t his type. Yes, our son would often insist, enigmatically, that he wasn’t “as good” as I thought he was. . . . And yes, there was Alex’s one gay friend to whom I’d been introduced; that would be Chris—now known to be the love of his life.
It was a revelation, that day in May, that already he and Chris had made sensible plans for a future together. Already they had become legal domestic partners, and Chris’s house would soon be their shared home. . . . The following summer, after the passing in November 2012 of a State referendum permitting same-sex marriage, they would be legally married in a moving and sanctified ceremony. Leave it to Alex to do it with grace and class, and make us proud.
My husband, too, searched for missed clues as to his son’s “natural nature,” and brought to mind a branch on his family tree consisting of aunts, uncles, and cousins who had never married—as was the case with his own bachelor brother. Dad has become a vocal proponent of same-sex marriage in his own circles. To Alex, he cheerfully rationalized that the new state of affairs was “Plan B.”
That our own religion (Baha’i) condemned the very idea of Alex and Chris’s relationship was a bitter pill to swallow. My therapy was to take up the violin. The violin sang sweet midnight songs to soothe my conflicted soul. It intoned simple harmonies to distract from the dissonant clashing of faith and reason, of immutable dogma and evident truth. It wept for all gay youth rejected and disowned for coming out; for those who were forced to live a lie; and for the more devout among them who contemplated in lonely distress the cruel fates which awaited “sinners” with wayward inclinations.
Ultimately, I had to choose between allegiance to God’s Will as interpreted by my faith (which requires celibacy on the part of homosexual members)— and supporting the love of two guys who intended to become family. Love won. In the interest of personal integrity, I had no choice but to formally withdraw from the faith to which I had given about 37 years of my life.
Had our son continued to bear his burden of guilt in silence, this family’s story, like others, could have ended badly. Alex’s coming out was the demarcation between darkness and light, for himself and for those whose lives he has touched. As for me, this being my story, his painful revelation in May was the pivotal moment when latent homophobia, bred of ignorance and holy writ, was replaced by compassion and understanding. My epiphany on May 30, 2012 was a blessing. I was blind—but in a dizzying, transformative, lightning flash, I saw.
Read the original and more here
Today, however, he replied in a voice heavy with resignation: “That’s a story for another day . . . .”
For some strange reason, I gently dared to ask: “Alex, are you . . . gay? In the uncomfortable, prolonged silence which followed, I steeled myself for the unexpected reply: “Yes,” he said in a breaking voice. “It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to say.” Though my world had just experienced a seismic event, nevertheless my heart immediately went out to our brave, youngest child—ever truthful, even when it was the hardest thing he had ever had to say.
During the remainder of that phone call, I learned everything I did not know about what it meant to be gay, as he patiently answered my many questions. My mental adjustment was almost instantaneous: our beloved son was now our beloved gay son. My emotional adjustment was just beginning.
Over the coming days, I searched my cerebral cortex for subtle clues that would point to homosexuality. Certainly our son was the picture of masculinity. But . . . yes—there was Alex’s lukewarm interest in an internet dating site to which my husband, with the best of intentions, had unwittingly subscribed on his behalf. And yes, there was the hint that most girls weren’t his type. Yes, our son would often insist, enigmatically, that he wasn’t “as good” as I thought he was. . . . And yes, there was Alex’s one gay friend to whom I’d been introduced; that would be Chris—now known to be the love of his life.
It was a revelation, that day in May, that already he and Chris had made sensible plans for a future together. Already they had become legal domestic partners, and Chris’s house would soon be their shared home. . . . The following summer, after the passing in November 2012 of a State referendum permitting same-sex marriage, they would be legally married in a moving and sanctified ceremony. Leave it to Alex to do it with grace and class, and make us proud.
My husband, too, searched for missed clues as to his son’s “natural nature,” and brought to mind a branch on his family tree consisting of aunts, uncles, and cousins who had never married—as was the case with his own bachelor brother. Dad has become a vocal proponent of same-sex marriage in his own circles. To Alex, he cheerfully rationalized that the new state of affairs was “Plan B.”
That our own religion (Baha’i) condemned the very idea of Alex and Chris’s relationship was a bitter pill to swallow. My therapy was to take up the violin. The violin sang sweet midnight songs to soothe my conflicted soul. It intoned simple harmonies to distract from the dissonant clashing of faith and reason, of immutable dogma and evident truth. It wept for all gay youth rejected and disowned for coming out; for those who were forced to live a lie; and for the more devout among them who contemplated in lonely distress the cruel fates which awaited “sinners” with wayward inclinations.
Ultimately, I had to choose between allegiance to God’s Will as interpreted by my faith (which requires celibacy on the part of homosexual members)— and supporting the love of two guys who intended to become family. Love won. In the interest of personal integrity, I had no choice but to formally withdraw from the faith to which I had given about 37 years of my life.
Had our son continued to bear his burden of guilt in silence, this family’s story, like others, could have ended badly. Alex’s coming out was the demarcation between darkness and light, for himself and for those whose lives he has touched. As for me, this being my story, his painful revelation in May was the pivotal moment when latent homophobia, bred of ignorance and holy writ, was replaced by compassion and understanding. My epiphany on May 30, 2012 was a blessing. I was blind—but in a dizzying, transformative, lightning flash, I saw.
Read the original and more here
Via Daily Dharma: Stop Feeding the Pain Pattern
When we meditate, we are training the mind to stop feeding a pain pattern.
—Ruth King, “Soothing the Hot Coals of Rage”
—Ruth King, “Soothing the Hot Coals of Rage”
Monday, June 26, 2017
Via The NewYorker: Kids Attend Drag Queen Story Hour
A new reading series at the Brooklyn Public Library introduces elements of gender bending and camp to little ones.
On a recent Saturday morning, about two dozen small children and their parents gathered in the Park Slope branch of the Brooklyn Public Library for a new reading series. There were pregnant women with tattoos, breast-feeding moms, and a little girl in pink ballerina gear climbing on the laps of her two dads. Many of the kids, who ranged in age from newborn to five years old, wore tiny T-shirts showcasing their parents’ favorite bands (Nirvana, David Bowie) or political views (one read, “The Future Is Female”).
The event was hosted by
Michelle Tea, a writer from Los Angeles, who started attending library
story hours after becoming a mom. “Story time rises or falls on the
charisma of the storyteller,” she said. “Some seemed to have a
personality disorder or didn’t even like children.” She’d brought her
partner, Dashiell Lippman, and their two-year-old son, Atticus, who had a
haircut that resembled David Beckham’s. “He is pretty butch—we call him
Fratticus,” Tea said. “I’m always pushing a tutu on him, but he’s,
like, ‘No.’ ”
Tea’s solution, called Drag Queen
Story Hour, introduces elements of gender bending and camp. “I have
long thought that drag queens need to be the performers at children’s
parties, rather than magicians or clowns,” she said. “Drag has become
more mainstream. Kids might have seen one on a billboard or on TV.”
Rachel
Aimee was at the library because she had seen a Facebook post about the
series. “I work at the Feminist Press and thought, Maybe we could
present it,” she said. “The thing that first struck me was it’s all
about dressing up and being pretty without the baggage of gender coding.
As a parent, I’ve been looking for something like that.”
“Yeah,
it’s just fun and glitter,” said Tea, who was wearing animal-print
palazzo pants and had a red heart tattoo on each of her fingers.
Having
a six-year-old daughter has made Aimee question some of her feminist
beliefs. “She got really into watching ‘Barbie: Life in the Dream
House,’ ” Aimee said. “How could I tell her not to watch it? It has a
thousand girls and only, like, two boys in it. I would be teaching her
that shows about girls are bad.”
At eleven
o’clock, Tea made her way to the front of the room. “Do you all know
what a drag queen is?” she asked the children. “Drag queens are amazing.
They get to do fun things like dance and sing and travel and play
dress-up with their drag-queen friends. And they’re all feminists.” The
parents chuckled politely.
The drag queen Lil
Miss Hot Mess came out, wearing a white sequinned tunic dress and
matching heels, bright-pink tights, and a curly auburn wig. (She has
performed at Bushwig, a drag festival, and at SFMOMA.)
She declined to give her birth name but said that she is a graduate
student in media studies at N.Y.U. She put on black owlish reading
glasses, sat on a folding chair, and addressed her audience: “Can
everyone say, ‘When I grow up, I want to be a drag queen’?”
The children just stared.
She
would be reading from “Tatterhood,” a collection of feminist folktales,
which had originally been published by the Feminist Press, in the
nineteen-seventies. The title story, from Norway, features a feisty
goat-riding heroine who fights off angry trolls with a spoon.
Via Organizing for Action
On October 10th, 2015, I married my partner, Stephen. We'd met in Washington, D.C., bonded over our shared Boston background, and traveled all across the U.S. together.
So naturally our wedding was in Copenhagen, Denmark.
Two years earlier, I'd accepted President Obama's invitation to become the Ambassador to Denmark. Stephen and I had gradually settled into our new city. We'd learned of its proud history as the world's first nation to recognize same-sex marriages.
And so we stood at Copenhagen City Hall, the spot of the very first same-sex marriages -- 26 years earlier -- and said our vows. It made it even more special that the U.S. had legalized same-sex marriage nationwide just four months earlier.
In that moment, though, what I felt had nothing to do with politics. It was personal -- the same little moments and feelings that everyone experiences on their wedding day: Love. Friendship. Family. All of the good things. All of the happy words.
To deny anyone the happiness we felt that day is inconceivable. And as I look at the progress we've made, I know how important it is to keep fighting.
Since our wedding day, we've been overwhelmed by the good happening in communities around the country. The people in the LGBTQ community who bravely share their story. The people who listen to them.
The marches.
Our marches have always been more than celebrations. They're how we defend our hard-won advances -- and how we clear a path for the issues that we still need to tackle. As this administration threatens our progress, that's never been more true.
That energy is where my pride comes from. Because if there's one thing that has been true for every single progressive issue in our country, it's that sweeping change -- the kind we look back on and say, "Well, this was inevitable" -- really isn't. It comes from us.
So I say to everyone, both LGBTQ and non-LGBTQ: Show up this month. Be loud. Be proud. And don't forget the work we still have to do. Stand with OFA now:
|
Thanks,
Rufus
Rufus Gifford
Former United States Ambassador to Denmark
Via Ram Dass
When I go out into the woods, and I look at trees, I say, “Oh, look at that one, oh look at that one, oh how interesting!” I don’t ask why an Elm isn’t an Oak… I just appreciate them for what they are.
Somehow it’s different when I get near humans, I somehow feel that it’s a whole different category, and I move into my judging mode, saying, “If that person was more like that person, things would be better.”
Now I don’t elevate human relationships that much. I see them as just more of the interaction with the phenomenal world, and another person is a set of phenomena manifested, and I see that I'm getting upset because somebody is a certain way, I take that upset and ask, “Why am I upset?” I realize that a part of my upset is because I have a model that I am holding of how the world should be other than the way it is.
I have the choice of either trying to change the world to adhere to my model, or let go of my model to be with the world.
Somehow it’s different when I get near humans, I somehow feel that it’s a whole different category, and I move into my judging mode, saying, “If that person was more like that person, things would be better.”
Now I don’t elevate human relationships that much. I see them as just more of the interaction with the phenomenal world, and another person is a set of phenomena manifested, and I see that I'm getting upset because somebody is a certain way, I take that upset and ask, “Why am I upset?” I realize that a part of my upset is because I have a model that I am holding of how the world should be other than the way it is.
I have the choice of either trying to change the world to adhere to my model, or let go of my model to be with the world.
-- Ram Dass --
Via Daily Dharma: The Pure Land Is in This Life
I
don’t envision a single thing that, when undeveloped, leads to such
great harm as the mind . . . . I don’t envision a single thing that,
when developed, leads to such great benefit as the mind.
—The Buddha, “The Single Thing”
—The Buddha, “The Single Thing”
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