RIGHT SPEECH
Refraining from Malicious Speech
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Malicious speech is
unhealthy. Refraining from malicious speech is healthy. (MN 9)
Abandoning malicious speech, one refrains from malicious speech. One
does not repeat there what one has heard here to the detriment of these,
or repeat here what he has heard there to the detriment of those. One
unites those who are divided, is a promoter of friendships, and speaks
words that promote concord. (DN 1) One practices thus: “Others may speak
maliciously, but I shall abstain from malicious speech.” (MN 8)
If anyone should speak in disparagement of something, you should not be
angry, resentful, or upset on that account. If you were to be angry or
displeased that would only be an impediment to you, and then you could
not recognize whether what they say is rightly said or not rightly said.
If others should speak in disparagement of something, then you are to
explain what is incorrect as being incorrect. (DN 1)
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Speech is a
two-way street, and the practice of right speech includes the ability to
listen well in addition to speaking well. When you are the recipient of
malicious speech—words that are intended to attack and wound and induce
anger in you—it is a practice in itself to resist the temptation to
take offense and lash out with your own malicious speech. Equanimity is
the tool to use here, allowing you to not take things personally.
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Practice
listening to the words of others, especially those that are critical of
you or that disagree with opinions you hold dear, without taking them
personally. Notice when the reflex of self-defense rears up; notice how
it inclines you to resist what is being said and even to want to attack
the person saying it—and then use the power of equanimity to regard the
content objectively, without being automatically triggered into
aversion.
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Tomorrow: Reflecting upon Verbal Action
One week from today: Refraining from Harsh Speech
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