June 12, 2025
Shame vs. Healthy Embarrassment
A deeply painful emotion, shame can feel impossible to overcome, especially given the tendency to bury it where no one can see it—not even ourselves. But the Buddha taught that shame can be humbling and inspiring if we resist identifying with it and observe it for what it is: self-protection in response to causes and conditions.
Soto Zen teacher Koshin Paley Ellison calls positive shame healthy embarrassment, and says it’s an important part of the Buddhist path. Looking closely and examining the root of shame not only diminishes its influence but also helps us move forward.
This willingness to dig into the roots of our shame also helps us meet it with compassion.
“Sometimes our beliefs about ourselves get so ingrained that they block us from seeing anything else that’s there, and we spend years trying to get away from it. The real story is much bigger than we know,” says writer Daisy Lin. “How can we bring tenderness to that story, and start dissolving the false stories we’re telling ourselves?”
This week’s Three Teachings offers three reflections on shame and how to work with it. | 
No comments:
Post a Comment