A personal blog by a graying (mostly Anglo with light African-American roots) gay left leaning liberal progressive married college-educated Buddhist Baha'i BBC/NPR-listening Professor Emeritus now following the Dharma in Minas Gerais, Brasil.
Our entire biological structure is designed for engagement with the world. Every sense organ is a gateway for encounter, and through this exchange, we achieve a greater definition of who we are.
Malicious speech is unhealthy. Refraining from malicious speech is healthy. (MN 9) Abandoning malicious speech, one refrains from malicious speech. One does not repeat there what one has heard here to the detriment of these, or repeat here what he has heard there to the detriment of those. One unites those who are divided, is a promoter of friendships, and speaks words that promote concord. (DN 1) One practices thus: "Others may speak maliciously, but I shall abstain from malicious speech."(MN 8)
When others address you, their speech may be true or untrue. . . . One is to train thus: "My mind will be unaffected, and I shall utter no bad words; I shall abide with compassion for their welfare, with a mind of lovingkindness, without inner hate." (MN 21)
Reflection
These days, it seems we are surrounded by malicious speech. So much speech is intended to divide, to insult, and to vent anger and frustration. We do not need to participate in this, however alluring it may seem at times. We can choose to work in the other direction, speaking in ways that unite people and promote concord. As you become sensitized to this, its healthy benefits become increasingly apparent.
Daily Practice
It is hard to remain equanimous when you know people are lying to you. "But still they do what’s hard to do," the Buddha said in the face of this. To resist the reflex to strike back and instead respond with kindness and compassion is a difficult practice. Yet it can be done. Regardless of the facts on the table, the quality of our own response in any situation is the measure of our wisdom and understanding.
Tomorrow: Reflecting upon Verbal Action One week from today: Refraining from Harsh Speech
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Whatever you intend, whatever you plan, and whatever you have a tendency toward will become the basis on which your mind is established. (SN 12.40) Develop meditation on compassion, for when you develop meditation on compassion, any cruelty will be abandoned. (MN 62)
The characteristic of compassion is promoting the allaying of suffering. (Vm 9.93)
Reflection
Compassion is not an innate disposition but a skill to be learned and cultivated. Our capacity for compassion is innate, but whether or not it is expressed has to do with how we train ourselves to behave in the world. Cruelty is as natural as compassion, something demonstrated often in human history. But we, right now, can choose to care about others and to alleviate their suffering. The choosing to care is itself the practice.
Daily Practice
The value of compassion for others is obvious. They are comforted, made to feel safe, and are often given what they need to feel better. The value of compassion for oneself is subtler. It helps mold your personality and character in a healthy way and blocks any chance of its opposite, cruelty, manifesting. Practice caring when you see people or other beings suffering. Then notice how you are changed by this caring.
Tomorrow: Refraining from Malicious Speech One week from today: Cultivating Appreciative Joy
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