Via Dhamma Wheel | Right Speech: Refraining from Harsh Speech

 

RIGHT SPEECH Refraining from Harsh Speech

Harsh speech is unhealthy. Refraining from harsh speech is healthy. (MN 9) Abandoning harsh speech, one refrains from harsh speech. One speaks words that are gentle, pleasing to the ear, and affectionate, words that go to the heart, are courteous, and are agreeable to many. (DN 1) One practices thus: "Others may speak harshly, but I shall abstain from harsh speech." (MN 8) When one says, "All those disengaged from the pursuit of the enjoyment of sensual pleasures have entered upon the right way," one thus extols some people. But when one says instead, "The disengagement from the pursuit of the enjoyment of sensual pleasures is a state without suffering, and it is the right way," then one is not extolling anyone but is simply stating the truth. (MN 139)

Reflection

One of the common patterns of speech that causes difficulty is the tendency to extol some people and disparage others. We judge and label people as good or bad, right or wrong, based on what they do and then use speech to overpraise some people and overly blame others. This leads to a form of harsh speech that is directed at individuals, who will naturally take it personally and respond by retaliating against the blaming.

Daily Practice

Practice actively framing everything you see people around you doing as impersonal actions of body, speech, and mind rather than as qualities of the people as individuals. It is not that people are kind or cruel but their actions may be kind or cruel. Praising the person may elevate their sense of self and contribute to such things as inflated pride, while praising their actions will encourage further good action.

Tomorrow: Reflecting upon Mental Action
One week from today: Refraining from Frivolous Speech

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