We are not called upon as Buddhists to deny the world, and certainly not to escape from it. We are called to live with it, and to make our peace with all that is. The world of worries we wish to escape from in the beginning of Buddhist practice is found to be enlightenment itself in the end. |
Anger, annoyance, and impatience deplete energy. Patient effort strengthens our resources. We need to practice cooling emotional fires and alleviating fierce disruptions from our lives. The benefits of developing greater patience will be felt in all our relationships: intimate, casual, professional, as well as that all-important relationship, the one we have with ourselves. |
When gay marriage finally becomes widespread, how quickly (if at all) will we act to correct each other when we identify someone's significant other?It took almost seven years, but this very thing happened to me last night as I was rather archly informed that the couple I'd referred to as "husbands" were not married. They've just lived together for 22 years.
"There goes David and his husband."
"Oh, they aren't married, just living together."
Will we do that? Will we give those who choose not to marry a verbal downgrade to "just living together", to "just boyfriends"? Gay people have traditionally operated fast and loose with the rules of defining and naming our relationships.
Will there be a sense of relief then, as we convert to straight society's hierarchy of relationships and start identifying couples as: dating, living together, or married? I think that the implied legitimacy of a legal marriage will tempt many of our people to begin resorting relationships into those separate categories. And I don't know how I feel about that.
Whether pleasant, unpleasant, or neutral, gross or subtle, every sensation shares the same characteristic: it arises and passes away, arises and passes away. It is this arising and passing that we have to experience through practice, not just accept as truth because Buddha said so, not just accept because intellectually it seems logical enough to us. We must experience sensation’s nature, understand its flux, and learn not to react to it. |
Alliance for Justice, American Civil Liberties Union, American Federation of Government Employees, American Federation of Musicians, American Federation of State, County & Municipal Employees, American Federation of Teachers, Americans for Democratic Action, Anti-Defamation League, Association of Flight Attendants, Center for American Progress, Coalition of Labor Union Women, COLAGE, Courage Campaign, Communications Workers of America, Family Equality Council, Feminist Majority, Freedom to Marry, GLAD, Gay & Lesbian Medical Association, Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network (GLSEN), Human Rights Campaign, Immigration Equality, Interfaith Alliance, International Union, UAW, Lambda Legal, The Leadership Conference on Civil and Human Rights, Log Cabin Republicans, MALDEF, National Black Justice Coalition, National Center for Lesbian Rights, National Council of Jewish Women, National Education Association, National Fair Housing Alliance, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, National Organization for Women, National Partnership for Women and Families, National Women’s Law Center, People for the American Way, PFLAG, Pride at Work, AFL-CIO, Religious Action Center of Reform Judaism, Services and Advocacy for GLBT Elders (SAGE), Service Employees International Union, Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, Stonewall Democrats, Third Way, Unitarian Universalist Association, United Electrical, Radio and Machine Workers of America (UE), United Food and Commercial Workers International Union, and USAction.Last fall the Senate Judiciary Committee approved a repeal of DOMA, but the bill was not advanced to the full chamber because it would not pass there. A House version of a DOMA repeal bill would likely not survive its committee. However there is some hope that Democrats may improve their position in Congress this fall.
Tracey Cooper-Harris served her country for 12 years in the U.S. Army. She received more than two dozen medals and commendations. She was honorably discharged in 2003. In 2010, Cooper-Harris was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, a disabling disease that attacks the brain and central nervous system. The Department of Veterans Affairs denied Cooper-Harris’ request for benefits for her partner, even though their same-sex marriage was recognized by California. The Southern Poverty Law Center filed a lawsuit on behalf of Cooper-Harris and her partner, charging that the Department of Veterans Affairs discriminated against them by denying these benefits but granting them to spouses in heterosexual marriages. It also charges the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) is unconstitutional because it bans federal agencies from recognizing such same-sex marriages, denying these couples benefits available to couples in heterosexual marriages
It is important to sit with the clear intention to be present. At the same time, we need to let go of expectations. In a very real sense, what happens when we sit is none of our business. The practice is to accept whatever arises instead of trying to control our experience. What we can control is our wise effort to be present with what is. |
UPDATE: Under the leadership of openly gay Sen. Ed Murray and with the critical support of several Republican Senators, the bill has passed after failed attempts to attach nasty amendments. One of the failed GOP amendments would have made it legal for any business to discriminate against gay couples. Another would have immediately placed the issue on the November ballot. That will likely happen anyway via a public petition drive, but the Democrats swatted it down. Onward to the Washington House, where passage is guaranteed."Amazon is joining other Pacific Northwest companies, including Microsoft, Starbucks and Nike, in support of Washington state's marriage equality bills," Amazon said in a statement released by spokeswoman Mary Osako. "The spirit of these bills is consistent with our longstanding employment practices." Gay marriage supporters believe they have enough votes to pass the measure out of both houses, and Gov. Chris Gregoire has said she'll sign it into law.Do I hear another boycott call? Squeee!
MTV will air a star-studded hour-long special about It Gets Better. Among those slated to appear are Zachary Quinto and Adam Levine.It just keeps getting better over at MTV and Logo — and for gay teens on TV. EW has exclusively learned that the sister cable networks are jointly prepping a special titled It Gets Better, which will chronicle the stories of three young people struggling with LGBT issues. The 60-minute special will premiere on both MTV and Logo on Feb. 21 at 11 p.m. Syndicated columnist Dan Savage — who in fall 2010 launched the buzzy It Gets Better Project, which led to an avalanche of more than 30,000 videos of encouragement for LGBT youth — will anchor the hour. The show will include appearances by actor Zachary Quinto, Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine, comedian Margaret Cho, Dancing with the Stars contestant Chaz Bono, and Jersey Shore star Vinny Guadagnino. Singers Sia and Jake Shears will also contribute video messages of hope and support.
"Moving forward I believe the best thing that we can do is to honor her strength, and conviction, and her leadership, by getting somebody, quickly, because we don’t have much time, into that seat who is going to carry forward in the tradition of moderate, bipartisan, common sense governance that she did so well for Southern Arizona." - Openly gay Arizona state Rep. Matt Heinz, declaring his intent to run in the special election to replace Rep. Gabrielle Giffords.Metta practice is the cultivation of our capacity for lovingkindness. It does not involve either positive thinking or the imposition of an artificial positive attitude. There is no need to feel loving or kind during metta practice. Rather, we meditate on our good intentions, however weak or strong they may be, and water the seeds of these intentions. When we water wholesome intentions instead of expressing unwholesome ones, we develop those wholesome tendencies within us. |
“We thank Chair Pedersen and the members of the Judiciary Committee who supported marriage equality today,” said Lacey All, Chair of Washington United for Marriage. “As the bill continues to progress in both chambers in Olympia, it is clear that momentum is on our side. The stories of love, honor, commitment and family that our legislators are hearing from their constituents continue to be the single most important factor that sets us apart from those who oppose this bill.”The full Senate will debate and vote on the bill this Wednesday. House action should follow shortly after. Gov. Christine Gregoire has promised to sign the bill, but its implementation may be suspended pending the expected November challenge at the ballot.
As part of a campaign to reduce HIV infections in Africa, groups such as the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation are advocating the use of the above "simpler" circumcision method. The new procedure is intended to speed the rate of circumcisions in regions that have few doctors.Circumcision is believe to protect heterosexual men because the foreskin has many Langerhans cells, which pick up viruses and “present” them to the immune system — which H.I.V. attacks. From the initial safety studies done so far, PrePex is clearly faster, less painful and more bloodless than any of its current rivals. And it relies on the simplest and least-threatening technology — a rubber band. The band compresses the foreskin against a plastic ring slipped inside it; the foreskin dies within hours for lack of blood and, after a week, falls off or can be clipped off “like a fingernail,” said Tzameret Fuerst, the company’s chief executive officer, who compared the process to the stump of an umbilical cord’s shriveling up and dropping off a few days after it is clamped. It is done with topical anesthetic cream, and there is usually no bleeding. And PrePex can be put in place and removed by nurses with about three days’ training.Three separate studies have shown that circumcision can reduce HIV infection from vaginal sex by up to 60%. Another study was cut short when it became clear that circumcising men that are already infected provided no protection to women. In 2009 the CDC announced that it was considering recommending that American boys be circumcised at birth, but that policy was never formalized. No study has yet confirmed that circumcision provides any protection for gay men.
Sometimes people get very rigid and tense trying to be good, disciplined, and ethical. Tension can also arise when we become more aware of the immense amount of destruction—seen and unseen, intentional and unintentional—that our mere physical existence causes. From a Buddhist point of view, however, this is what it means to be born in samsara, and this is why we need to attain freedom from samsara. |
"My recent comments in The New York Times were about me and my personal story of being gay. I believe we all have different ways we came to the gay community and we can't and shouldn't be pigeon-holed into one cultural narrative which can be uninclusive and disempowering. However, to the extent that anyone wishes to interpret my words in a strictly legal context I would like to clarify: While I don't often use the word, the technically precise term for my orientation is bisexual. I believe bisexuality is not a choice, it is a fact. What I have 'chosen' is to be in a gay relationship." - Cynthia Nixon, speaking to the Advocate.
Awareness is the basis, or what you might call the “support,” of the mind. It is steady and unchanging, like the pole to which the flag of ordinary consciousness is attached. When we recognize and become grounded in awareness of awareness, the “wind” of emotion may still blow. But instead of being carried away by the wind, we turn our attention inward, watching the shifts and changes with the intention of becoming familiar with that aspect of consciousness that recognizes "Oh, this is what I’m feeling, this is what I’m thinking." As we do so, a bit of space opens up within us. |
"[T]he born-this-way approach carries an unintended implication that the behavior of gays and lesbians needs biological grounding to evade condemnation. Why should it? Our laws safeguard religious freedom, and that’s not because there’s a Presbyterian, Buddhist or Mormon gene. There’s only a tradition and theology that you elect or decline to follow. But this country has deemed worshiping in a way that feels consonant with who you are to be essential to a person’s humanity. So it’s protected. Our laws also safeguard the right to bear arms: not exactly a biological imperative. Among adults, the right to love whom you’re moved to love — and to express it through sex and maybe, yes, marriage — is surely as vital to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness as a Glock. And it’s a lot less likely to cause injury, if that’s a deciding factor: how a person’s actions affect the community around him or her." - New York Times columnist Frank Bruni, on Cynthia Nixon's controversial comments.
Skillful attitudes of mind are the key to facing potentially explosive situations and the ongoing highs and lows of life and practice. In fact, recognizing these attitudes and cultivating their antidotes is the foundation for all spiritual growth. By cultivating skillful attitudes of mind, we will respond to more and more of life with awareness and wisdom. With steady awareness of the way things are, the perseverance to stay with that awareness, and the willingness to learn from it, we maximize our sense of well-being. |
GOP Rep. Tim Huelskamp has introduced a bill which allows military chaplains to refuse to conduct same-sex marriages. Which they already can. But the bill also bans the use of military facilities for such events. "Here they go again with another round of resistance tactics that have already been rejected by Congress and the American people. There is no need for the so-called 'protections' in this bill or the proposed regulations. No chaplain today is being required or pressured to marry anyone, straight or gay. Period. The bill's ban on use of military facilities and chaplains officiating at ceremonies for gay and lesbian service members is nothing more than plain, old-fashion discrimination. There is no place for that prejudice in our armed forces or in our country," said Sarvis.Human Rights Campaign
Rep. Huelskamp and other right wing Republican Members of Congress appear to have missed the memo from military leaders who say that open service is working just fine. Instead, in their compulsive need to use our brave men and women in uniform as political pawns, these Members of Congress have invented issues that don’t exist in order to score some points. These antics coming from Rep. Huelskamp shouldn’t be a surprise as he was the one forced to admit on the floor of the U.S. House last summer that he wanted to strip funding for training materials that he hadn’t even read.
