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On-Retaliation as a Spiritual Practice

We do not have to get back at those who hate us or hurt our

feelings. We have alternative spiritual practices that free us from

that primitive reaction.

Revenge, at first though sweet,

Bitter ere long back on itself recoils.

-John Milton: Paradise Lost, Book 9

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Quotations from various traditions about letting go of

the urge to retaliate:

One act of retaliation burns to the ground a whole forest of

merit.

–Buddhist Teachings: Dhammapada

Requite evil with what is best. Then truly he between whom

and you there was enmity, will become your dearest friend.

-Koran: 41:34

Do not say: “I’ll do to them as they have done to me;

I’ll pay them back for what they did.”

-Hebrew Bible: Proverbs 24:29

Let him offer his cheek to one who would strike him.

- Hebrew Bible: Lamentations 3:30

He was insulted and did not retaliate with insult; he was

tortured and made no threat.

–Christian New Testament: First Letter of St. Peter 2:23

A view of God as punitive and retributive nullifies any in-

depth spiritual journey: Why would you love or trust or desire to

be with such a God?

-Richard Rohr, Franciscan teacher

I saw the fires of hell and people were not burning there. All

that was burning was what they had refused to let go of on earth.

And the flames were not punishing; they were liberating… The

only thing that burns in hell is the part of you that won’t let go of

your life: your memories, your attachments. The [flames] burn

them all away, but they’re not punishing you, they’re freeing your

soul.

-Meister Eckhart, 14 th Century mystic

We avoid retaliating….

Alcoholics Anonymous: page 67

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Retaliation in relationships:

It is a quarrel most unnatural

To be revenged on him that loveth you.

-Shakespeare: Richard II

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Retaliation helps us avoid the grief that is behind it:

Hope of revenge shall hide our inward woe.

—Shakespeare: Troilus and Cressida

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Spiritual Practices to free ourselves from the choice to

retaliate:

Treat others the way you want them to treat you.

-Golden Rule

Loving one’s oppressors—we Cambodians loving the

Khmer Rouge—may be the most difficult attitude to achieve. But

it is the law of the universe that retaliation, hatred, and revenge

only continue the cycle and never stop it. Reconciliation does not

mean that we surrender rights. It means that we see ourselves in

the opponent. For what is the opponent but a being in ignorance,

as we are so often. Therefore, only loving-kindness and right

mindfulness can free us.

–Venerable Ghosananda, Buddhist Patriarch of Cambodia

Love means more than moving toward individuals. It means

loving the world so we take a stand against the normalcy of

violence and the values of the world so it can be a better place

[finding] a method which rejects revenge, aggression and

retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love.

-Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., in his acceptance speech for the

1964 Nobel Peace Prize

Do good to him who has injured you.

–Tao Te Ching 63

Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless

those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.

-Luke: 6:27-28

"Love your enemy" doesn't mean love the person you hate.

You can't do that. Love those who hate you.

-B. Alan Wallace

When you begin to see the suffering in the other person,

compassion is born, and you no longer consider that person as

your enemy. The moment you realize that your so-called enemy

suffers and you want him to stop suffering, he ceases to be your

enemy.

–Thich Nhat Hanh

When they go low, we go high.

-Michelle Obama