Saturday, May 15, 2021
Via Daily Dharma: Releasing Our Expectations
We
have endless expectations that our experience will go a certain way,
and these expectations are almost inevitably foiled... Zen Buddhist
practice asks us to sit with and try to accept that incongruity, rather
than strain against it.
—Mike Gillis, “Cringing Toward Compassion”
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VIA White Crane Institute // 2018 - TODAY'S GAY WISDOM
GIVE UP!
15 Things To Give Up To Be Happy
- Give up the need to always be right
There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?
- Give up the need for control
Be willing to
give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and
around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved
ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow
them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you
will see how much better will that make you feel.“By
letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go.
But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu
- Give up on blame
Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.
- Give up self-defeating self-talk
Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.
“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle
- Give up limiting beliefs
…about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!
“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle
- Give up complaining
Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.
- Give up the luxury of criticism
Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.
- Give up the need to impress others
Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.
- Give up resistance to change
Change
is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you
make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you.
Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell
- Give up labels
Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open. “The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer
- Give up on fears
Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place. “The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt
- Give up excuses
Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.
- Give up the past
I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.
- Give up attachment
This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at it with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.
- Give up living life to other people’s expectations
Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves. You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.
Mindrolling – Raghu Markus – Ep. 392 – We’re All Still Here with Krishna Das, Daniel Goleman, & Rameshwar Das
Friday, May 14, 2021
Via White Crane Institute // This Day in Gay History May 14 Born
The great German physician, sexologist, and Gay Rights advocate MAGNUS HIRSHFELD was both born and died on this day (1868-1935). Known as "the Einstein of Sex" he is credited with developing the theory of a third, "intermediate sex" between men and women. In 1897, Hirschfeld founded the Scientific Humanitarian Committee, which gathered over 5000 signatures from prominent Germans for a petition to overturn Paragraph 175, the section of the German penal code that criminalized homosexuality (founded on this date as well -- see below). In 1921 He organized the First Congress for Sexual Reform, which led to the formation of the World League for Sexual Reform.
Hirschfeld co-wrote and acted in the 1919 film "Anders als die Andern" ("Different From the Others"), which featured the first homosexual character ever written for cinema. It was released a few years ago on DVD and still offers a fascinating view from the time. He also founded the Institute for Sexual Research which featured an immense library on sex and provided educational services and medical consultations.
The writers Christopher Isherwood & W.H. Auden both visited the institute while in Germany. When the Nazis took power, one of their first actions was to destroy the Institute and burn the library. At that time Hirschfeld was away from Germany on a speaking tour. He died in Nice on his 67th birthday in 1935, while in exile from his native Germany in Nice, France.
The word "transsexual" was coined by Dr. Hirschfeld to describe the phenomenon that he argued was a natural extension of human sexuality. His philosophy centered on the contention that there was a third sex, called the Uranian, which was neither male nor female, but a combination of both that was manifested in homosexuality, which was not to be considered an impure deviation, or even as an illness, but as a natural and phenomenal component of human nature.
For his work, the Nazis targeted Dr. Hirschfeld as an example of Jewish influence infecting the purity of the German people, luring the Aryan race into impure and destructive perversity. He was ultimately driven into exile and burned in effigy as an emblem of evil. The slogan with which he began his speeches, "Uranians of the World, Unite!" was not to be realized until our own time.
Via Daily Dharma: Breathing In and Breathing Out
—Jetsunma Tenzin Palmo, “Three Kinds of Laziness”
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Thursday, May 13, 2021
Via White Crane Institute // ARMISTEAD MAUPIN
Today is the birthday of writer, serialist and national treasure ARMISTEAD MAUPIN (1944). Maupin is most famous for his six book "Tales of the City" series of books. The first were originally published in serial forms in Bay Area newspapers. His later novels include "The Night Listener" and "Maybe The Moon" and 2009's "Michael Tolliver Lives." His name, coincidentally, is an anagram of "is a man I dreamt up."
It’s a busy life for The Wonderful Mr. Maupin with a brand spanking new musical based on Tales of the City. And PBS just featured a delightful documentary, The Untold Tales of Armistead Maupin, He is married to Christopher Turner. His most recent book revisits his beloved characters from Tales, The Days of Anna Madrigal. New York: Harper. 2014. ISBN 978-0062196248.
For more on Armistead Maupin, and maybe to send him a birthday greeting, visit his website at http://www.armisteadmaupin.
Happy Birthday Armistead. Long may you wave!
Via Daily Dharma: Conjuring Love
When we are able to arouse love in our hearts without any cause, just because love is the heart’s quality, we feel secure.
—Ayya Khema, “What Love Is”
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