A personal blog by a graying (mostly Anglo with light African-American roots) gay left leaning liberal progressive married college-educated Buddhist Baha'i BBC/NPR-listening Professor Emeritus now following the Dharma in Minas Gerais, Brasil.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Via JMG: Prop 8 Reactions
Former SF Mayor Gavin Newsom
Today’s decision by the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals stands as a victory for the fundamental American principle that all people are equal, and deserve equalrights and treatment under the law. This is the biggest step that theAmerican judicial system has taken to end the grievous discrimination against men and women in same-sex relationships and should be highly praised. "Proposition 8 has done nothing more than enshrine in the California Constitution the notion that same-sex couples are inferior to heterosexual couples. These men and women are our firefighters, our paramedics, our law enforcement, our service-members, and to treat their relationships differently is unfair, unlawful, and violates the basic principle of who we are as a nation.Mayors For Freedom
As Mayors for the Freedom to Marry, we know how important marriage is to our neighborhoods, our cities, and our nation. When committed couples are able to pledge their love to one another and share in the responsibilities and protections of marriage, our communities flourish and our cities are more competitive. Today’s decision by the 9th Circuit reaffirms that the American Dream is possible for everyone and brings us one step closer to ending marriage discrimination once and for all. We look forward to a day when all of our citizens will be able to share fairly and equally in the freedom to marryFreedom To Marry
This monumental appellate decision restores California to the growing list of states and countries that have ended exclusion from marriage, and will further accelerate the surging nationwide majority for marriage. As this and other important challenges to marriage discrimination move through the courts around the country, Freedom to Marry calls on all Americans to join us in ensuring that together we make as strong a case in the court of public opinion as our legal advocates are making in the courts of law. By growing the majority for marriage, winning more states, and tackling federal discrimination – Freedom to Marry’s ‘Roadmap to Victory’ – we maximize our chances of winning when one case or another finally reaches the U.S. Supreme Court.”More reactions will be added here as they come in....
Via Tricycle Daily Dharma:
Tricycle Daily Dharma February 7, 2012
Gentle Meditation
Although we are not often taught this, the most skillful way through an impasse in meditation is to become aware of it and of what holds it together and keeps it running. To do this, you need to keep doing the meditation instructions that have gotten you to this point, but instead of following them “harder,” try approaching them in a softer, gentler manner. Do them loosely, and don’t do them all of the time. |
- Jason Siff, "The Problem with Meditation Instructions"
Read the entire article in the Tricycle Wisdom Collection
Read the entire article in the Tricycle Wisdom Collection
Via AmericaBlogGay: Roland Martin and the deniability of homophobia
Roland Martin and the deniability of homophobia
Sometimes we're too sensitive. But I'm not buying that this is one of those times. The best homophobes skirt the line expertly. It doesn't change that what they're doing is wrong. I wrote in my other post, linked above, that perhaps it's subtle, the homophobia surrounding mocking men who wear pink or men react positively to homoerotic ad. One of our readers, Soullite, had a great response in the comments:
I don't think it's that subtle, really. Back in my more homophobic tween years, me and most of my friends would have decked anyone who said this to us [meaning, if they made fun of them for wearing pink etc], because we'd know damn well what they were saying. If a 12 year old would know it, I'm not buying that a grown man wouldn't know that this guy is basically pointing and screaming 'fag!' I think the big problem here is we let grown ups hide behind a smile and a fake-ass attitude of 'what, me?' We all pretend not to notice what's really going on out of some misguided politeness or a fear of calling these bastards out. But really, this sh*t isn't too subtle and there ain't a man over 10 who doesn't know what's going on here.
Monday, February 6, 2012
Via JMG: LA & SF To Rally After Prop 8 Decision
Rallies will be held in San Francisco and Los Angeles tomorrow after the Ninth Circuit Court issues its ruling on Proposition 8. Nothing in my inbox about NYC so far, but check back here later. Hit the links for Facebook event pages.
Reposted from Joe
Via JMG: TOMORROW: Prop 8 Ruling
Chris Geidner explains at Metro Weekly:
The long anticipated ruling is expected to address three issues: (1) whether former U.S. District Court Judge Vaughn Walker should have recused himself from hearing the case because he is gay and had a long-time partner with whom he was not married; (2) whether the proponents of Proposition 8 have the right to appeal Walker's decision striking down Proposition 8 as unconstitutional when none of the state defendants chose to do so; and (3) whether, if Walker did not need to recuse himself and the proponents do have the right to appeal, Walker was correct that Proposition 8 violates Californians' due process and equal protection rights guaranteed in the U.S. Constitution.
Via Tricycle Daily Dharma:
Tricycle Daily Dharma February 6, 2012
Cutting Through Anger
Mental noting takes us in a very different direction from getting lost in a story: “Oh, this anger is so miserable; I am such a terrible person because I’m always angry; this is just how I will always be,” and so on. Instead, we simply say to ourselves, “anger, anger”—and cut through all of that elaboration, the story, the judgment, the interpretation. |
- Sharon Salzberg and Joseph Goldstein, "Emotions and Hindrances"
Read the entire article in the Tricycle Wisdom Collection
Read the entire article in the Tricycle Wisdom Collection
Sunday, February 5, 2012
A letter to a Great Group of Folks in the States:
02.03.2012
Ouro Preto – MG - Brasil
Amigos –
How I wish I could be with you all, but alas…
First of all let me begin this rant, by saying how proud I am of all of you, and how much your friendship, mostly via the internet means to me. Laugh, cry, hug, and pray… light a fire this weekend!
In September of 1993, I met with a number of Gay and Lesbian Baha’is in Reno, Nevada. When it was over, we had drafted a letter to the National Spiritual Assembly, which they refused to answer. After that meeting I worked alongside other members of the Gay Baha’i Fellowship (GBF) in helping a number of GLBT Baha’is thru their crisis, and even went to so far as to work with Continental Counselor Stephen Birkland at a very powerful reconciliation weekend in Denver sponsored by the LSA of Denver. It was soon after that when Counselor Birkland called me to warn me of a letter from the Universal House of Justice, demanding that we disband. I quickly contacted the rest of the authors and GBF members and we all decided to “abide by their wishes in instant and exact obedience”. Soon after I resigned from the Faith, as it was obvious that my LSA was planning on something, and that my very presence, inactive as I was, was a cause for disunity.
But I was missing something.
About that time, a pair of neo-Nazi brothers from far Northern California, murdered a gay couple in their ranch home and then drove to Sacramento and set fire to three synagogues. The next day thousands people met in tears with candles in front of the State Capitol Building. On the very spot that Abdul-Baha himself walked and prophesied, religious leaders spoke, without a peep from the Baha’is, if they were there at all. I was soon asked to be part of a unity committee set up by the Rabbi of one of the synagogues and the School District Superintendent of our son’s school district. I accepted and was welcomed as an open gay Baha’i university professor. When we went through our workshop process, we found that we represented a diverse group of people from numerous religions, genders, races. Many of you know my story when the Rabbi called me one day to ask me about my thoughts about whether he should officiate at a wedding of two lesbians in his synagogue, I asked him, “Rabbi what is better a Jewish Lesbian or a non-Jewish lesbian?” (Rabbi Bloom went on to perform the wedding for the couple).
Along came 9/11 and I felt very, very alone, away from any spiritual community, so I asked to be reenrolled, a meeting was made with an assistant to the auxiliary board where questions were asked, I was assured that I was welcome, an anonymous person called me one day at work from the National Center and asked me if, and these were her exact words, “can you abide by the Baha’i laws?” I told her would to the “best of my abilities”. She welcomed me back into the Faith. At no time was I asked about my relationship, my marriage, nor did I volunteer any information that I can truthfully say, Counselor Birkland was in full knowledge of and still is to my understanding. Incidentally, at the Denver meeting, Birkland had given my former partner and I a lovely picture of the Purest Branch that he signed with a very loving message to us as a gesture of love and tolerance… That photo graced my home altar for many years, even when we split up and went our separate ways; which I feel was partly, not entirely, due to the stress this religion caused our relationship.
When in 1998, when I was in Brasil as a Fulbright Scholar, I met my husband Milton, who was able to come to California to earn a masters and a doctorate, and where we eventually married. During that time California passed first a domestic partnership law, and later a marriage law. We were both “domesticated” then married, which because Brasil recognizes gay weddings outside of the country, allows for me to immigrate to Brasil. In my enthusiasm over our wedding, I shared a video that my son (our best man) and his girlfriend produced of our wedding on the internet. Soon after, I received a letter from the NSA removing my rights, and accusing me of lying to them about my relationship in the most heinous and degrading of terms. Letters, videos all have been archived on my blog (see links below on revoked) for anyone to study, see, visit, comment and peruse, as I have absolutely nothing to hide or be ashamed of.
We are a respected couple, both informally in the community we live in and professionally, we have been together 15 years now, we are both professors at the Universidade Federal de Ouro Preto, and known for our research in ethnomathematics and mathematical modeling. Recently, we have been asked, as a pair, to present work at the British Museum, yet the Baha’i Faith finds us unclean, unworthy, and does not want us, or friends or family in its ranks!
I only share this, so that you can gain one more level of the darkness, hate, and absurdity that the homophobia this Faith allows and encourages. Currently, this religious community is so very sick, and it has effectively institutionalized its homophobia that continues to eat at it like a cancer. Because of this accepted hate, is chasing progressives of capacity away from it in droves. For every person it removes, it also disenfranchises hundreds that it needs as well.
But in a weird way I am equally grateful to the Baha’is, as all of this set me on a new spiritual quest, it has caused me to question the very veracity of the Faith itself, and left me feeling that Baha’u’llah was a very great man, but to wonder about his claims, as the religion of His followers is constructing is apparently built on sand. This inability to deal effectively, lovingly, and honestly with gay & lesbian issues in a modern, loving and informed manner was the last straw… it was to me, and I can say to many others I know, the canary in the mineshaft.
For my own sanity and spiritual health, I moved on. There is no refuge for me, or any gay man in the Baha’i Faith.
I became a Buddhist, finding needed love and refuge in a sangha in Sacramento before leaving for Brasil. The Sacramento Buddhist Mediation Group (SBMG) incidentally meets in the very synagogue of the Rabbi I worked with years earlier! When I moved to South America a year ago, I mailed my entire Baha’i library to the LSA of Carmichael, my beloved greatest name woven by a group of non-Baha’i women in Guatemala that I assisted was sent to a Baha’i man that I brought into the Faith when I lived in Guatemala. The photo of the Purest Branch was returned to Counselor Birkland in Haifa, now a Universal House of Justice member. It is noteworthy that only Tim, the colleague I sent my Greatest Name acknowledged the gifts and that only in passing, as if none of them could deal honestly with what they are doing to GLBT people.
Many of you have family members who are Baha’i. I was the only member in my extended family, I was alone, and I had no Baha’i support, ever. I taught the Faith, pioneered to Guatemala; home front pioneered, I did it all… alone, even my ex-wife refused to examine the Faith, and my straight son has rejected it outright for its homophobia. All the time withstood the prejudice from my family, and gladly did this for something I had thought was right, was good.
But the Baha’is have shown my colleagues, friends, my husband and son, that I was the fool, that by their actions, there is nothing here, no hope, no refuge… that it may indeed be a cult as my parents still think, and that it was all perhaps at best, a very nice utopian dream.
So it is I humbly offer you a few questions for your consultation:
1. When so many of our friends, colleagues, family who are members in other religions, with equal if not similar teachings on homosexuality are brave and stand up, and demand inclusion, why are GLBT Baha’is so afraid, so dysfunctional, and so incapable of being out and proud in this religion? What is it about the Baha’i Faith that so effectively terrorizes its GLBT members so? That either drives them underground or away?
2. Why is it that this religion cannot find a decent way in which to love and embrace their GLBT brethren, as so many other religious communities have done? Why is it that GLBT people are allowed to be discriminated against? Why is it that homophobes are not sanctioned?
3. How is it that after so many years, the questions asked of the NSA by the GBF are left largely unanswered?
4. Why is it that the leadership of the Faith cannot see the damage they created to the image of the Faith in the eyes of the progressive community around them?
5. Why are progressive people of capacity – straight and gay – being chased out of this Faith? Could it be that this religion that once held so much promise for many of us that now seems by this very homophobia is bankrupt, and false? Again, it breaks my heart to even contemplate this.
So I ask again, “Rabbi, what is better…?”
All my respect, admiration, support, light and energy from Brasil!
You all are so very deeply loved!
Daniel Clark Orey, Ph.D.
Resources:
http://revolked2.blogspot.com/
http://bahai-library.com/orey_open_letter_gays
http://revolked2.blogspot.com/2009/05/lets-start-with-consultign-about-my.html
http://revolked2.blogspot.com/2010/08/last-night-was-another-cornerstone-in.html
http://www.sbmg.org/
Ouro Preto – MG - Brasil
Amigos –
How I wish I could be with you all, but alas…
First of all let me begin this rant, by saying how proud I am of all of you, and how much your friendship, mostly via the internet means to me. Laugh, cry, hug, and pray… light a fire this weekend!
In September of 1993, I met with a number of Gay and Lesbian Baha’is in Reno, Nevada. When it was over, we had drafted a letter to the National Spiritual Assembly, which they refused to answer. After that meeting I worked alongside other members of the Gay Baha’i Fellowship (GBF) in helping a number of GLBT Baha’is thru their crisis, and even went to so far as to work with Continental Counselor Stephen Birkland at a very powerful reconciliation weekend in Denver sponsored by the LSA of Denver. It was soon after that when Counselor Birkland called me to warn me of a letter from the Universal House of Justice, demanding that we disband. I quickly contacted the rest of the authors and GBF members and we all decided to “abide by their wishes in instant and exact obedience”. Soon after I resigned from the Faith, as it was obvious that my LSA was planning on something, and that my very presence, inactive as I was, was a cause for disunity.
But I was missing something.
About that time, a pair of neo-Nazi brothers from far Northern California, murdered a gay couple in their ranch home and then drove to Sacramento and set fire to three synagogues. The next day thousands people met in tears with candles in front of the State Capitol Building. On the very spot that Abdul-Baha himself walked and prophesied, religious leaders spoke, without a peep from the Baha’is, if they were there at all. I was soon asked to be part of a unity committee set up by the Rabbi of one of the synagogues and the School District Superintendent of our son’s school district. I accepted and was welcomed as an open gay Baha’i university professor. When we went through our workshop process, we found that we represented a diverse group of people from numerous religions, genders, races. Many of you know my story when the Rabbi called me one day to ask me about my thoughts about whether he should officiate at a wedding of two lesbians in his synagogue, I asked him, “Rabbi what is better a Jewish Lesbian or a non-Jewish lesbian?” (Rabbi Bloom went on to perform the wedding for the couple).
Along came 9/11 and I felt very, very alone, away from any spiritual community, so I asked to be reenrolled, a meeting was made with an assistant to the auxiliary board where questions were asked, I was assured that I was welcome, an anonymous person called me one day at work from the National Center and asked me if, and these were her exact words, “can you abide by the Baha’i laws?” I told her would to the “best of my abilities”. She welcomed me back into the Faith. At no time was I asked about my relationship, my marriage, nor did I volunteer any information that I can truthfully say, Counselor Birkland was in full knowledge of and still is to my understanding. Incidentally, at the Denver meeting, Birkland had given my former partner and I a lovely picture of the Purest Branch that he signed with a very loving message to us as a gesture of love and tolerance… That photo graced my home altar for many years, even when we split up and went our separate ways; which I feel was partly, not entirely, due to the stress this religion caused our relationship.
When in 1998, when I was in Brasil as a Fulbright Scholar, I met my husband Milton, who was able to come to California to earn a masters and a doctorate, and where we eventually married. During that time California passed first a domestic partnership law, and later a marriage law. We were both “domesticated” then married, which because Brasil recognizes gay weddings outside of the country, allows for me to immigrate to Brasil. In my enthusiasm over our wedding, I shared a video that my son (our best man) and his girlfriend produced of our wedding on the internet. Soon after, I received a letter from the NSA removing my rights, and accusing me of lying to them about my relationship in the most heinous and degrading of terms. Letters, videos all have been archived on my blog (see links below on revoked) for anyone to study, see, visit, comment and peruse, as I have absolutely nothing to hide or be ashamed of.
We are a respected couple, both informally in the community we live in and professionally, we have been together 15 years now, we are both professors at the Universidade Federal de Ouro Preto, and known for our research in ethnomathematics and mathematical modeling. Recently, we have been asked, as a pair, to present work at the British Museum, yet the Baha’i Faith finds us unclean, unworthy, and does not want us, or friends or family in its ranks!
I only share this, so that you can gain one more level of the darkness, hate, and absurdity that the homophobia this Faith allows and encourages. Currently, this religious community is so very sick, and it has effectively institutionalized its homophobia that continues to eat at it like a cancer. Because of this accepted hate, is chasing progressives of capacity away from it in droves. For every person it removes, it also disenfranchises hundreds that it needs as well.
But in a weird way I am equally grateful to the Baha’is, as all of this set me on a new spiritual quest, it has caused me to question the very veracity of the Faith itself, and left me feeling that Baha’u’llah was a very great man, but to wonder about his claims, as the religion of His followers is constructing is apparently built on sand. This inability to deal effectively, lovingly, and honestly with gay & lesbian issues in a modern, loving and informed manner was the last straw… it was to me, and I can say to many others I know, the canary in the mineshaft.
For my own sanity and spiritual health, I moved on. There is no refuge for me, or any gay man in the Baha’i Faith.
I became a Buddhist, finding needed love and refuge in a sangha in Sacramento before leaving for Brasil. The Sacramento Buddhist Mediation Group (SBMG) incidentally meets in the very synagogue of the Rabbi I worked with years earlier! When I moved to South America a year ago, I mailed my entire Baha’i library to the LSA of Carmichael, my beloved greatest name woven by a group of non-Baha’i women in Guatemala that I assisted was sent to a Baha’i man that I brought into the Faith when I lived in Guatemala. The photo of the Purest Branch was returned to Counselor Birkland in Haifa, now a Universal House of Justice member. It is noteworthy that only Tim, the colleague I sent my Greatest Name acknowledged the gifts and that only in passing, as if none of them could deal honestly with what they are doing to GLBT people.
Many of you have family members who are Baha’i. I was the only member in my extended family, I was alone, and I had no Baha’i support, ever. I taught the Faith, pioneered to Guatemala; home front pioneered, I did it all… alone, even my ex-wife refused to examine the Faith, and my straight son has rejected it outright for its homophobia. All the time withstood the prejudice from my family, and gladly did this for something I had thought was right, was good.
But the Baha’is have shown my colleagues, friends, my husband and son, that I was the fool, that by their actions, there is nothing here, no hope, no refuge… that it may indeed be a cult as my parents still think, and that it was all perhaps at best, a very nice utopian dream.
So it is I humbly offer you a few questions for your consultation:
1. When so many of our friends, colleagues, family who are members in other religions, with equal if not similar teachings on homosexuality are brave and stand up, and demand inclusion, why are GLBT Baha’is so afraid, so dysfunctional, and so incapable of being out and proud in this religion? What is it about the Baha’i Faith that so effectively terrorizes its GLBT members so? That either drives them underground or away?
2. Why is it that this religion cannot find a decent way in which to love and embrace their GLBT brethren, as so many other religious communities have done? Why is it that GLBT people are allowed to be discriminated against? Why is it that homophobes are not sanctioned?
3. How is it that after so many years, the questions asked of the NSA by the GBF are left largely unanswered?
4. Why is it that the leadership of the Faith cannot see the damage they created to the image of the Faith in the eyes of the progressive community around them?
5. Why are progressive people of capacity – straight and gay – being chased out of this Faith? Could it be that this religion that once held so much promise for many of us that now seems by this very homophobia is bankrupt, and false? Again, it breaks my heart to even contemplate this.
So I ask again, “Rabbi, what is better…?”
All my respect, admiration, support, light and energy from Brasil!
You all are so very deeply loved!
Daniel Clark Orey, Ph.D.
Resources:
http://revolked2.blogspot.com/
http://bahai-library.com/orey_open_letter_gays
http://revolked2.blogspot.com/2009/05/lets-start-with-consultign-about-my.html
http://revolked2.blogspot.com/2010/08/last-night-was-another-cornerstone-in.html
http://www.sbmg.org/
Via JMG: Rolling Stone On Anti-Gay Bullying
I'm just going to give you one paragraph from Rolling Stone's excellent long-form piece on bullying and suicide in Michele Bachhmann's home district.
"This isn't something you kid about, Brittany," her mom scolded, snatching the kitchen cordless and taking it down the hall to call the Johnsons. A minute later she returned, her face a mask of shock and terror. "Honey, I'm so sorry. We're too late," she said tonelessly as Brittany's knees buckled; 13-year-old Sam had climbed into the bathtub after school and shot herself in the mouth with her own hunting rifle. No one at school had seen her suicide coming. No one saw the rest of them coming, either.Go read the rest.
Via Christians Tired of Being Misrepresented // The Christian Left: The War on Christianity
An article submitted by member, Rev. G. Jude Geiger. "This is the true War on Christianity in our country. It's not about prayer in schools, or soccer trumping Sunday school. It's about groups of pundits, politicians and "American"-centric groups redefining the teachings of Jesus to suit their economic, social or political agenda. You know it's working when those spouting the anti-Christian rhetoric rile people into anger and hatred. You know it's working when Christians are confused into believing that the the health of their neighbor is not their concern. That individual freedom is radically more important than community well-being."
Via Tricycle Daily Dharma:
Tricycle Daily Dharma February 5, 2012
Living with the World
We are not called upon as Buddhists to deny the world, and certainly not to escape from it. We are called to live with it, and to make our peace with all that is. The world of worries we wish to escape from in the beginning of Buddhist practice is found to be enlightenment itself in the end. |
- Clark Strand, "Worry Beads"
Read the entire article in the Tricycle Wisdom Collection
Read the entire article in the Tricycle Wisdom Collection
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Via Tricycle Daily Dharma:
Tricycle Daily Dharma February 4, 2012
Cooling Emotional Fires
Anger, annoyance, and impatience deplete energy. Patient effort strengthens our resources. We need to practice cooling emotional fires and alleviating fierce disruptions from our lives. The benefits of developing greater patience will be felt in all our relationships: intimate, casual, professional, as well as that all-important relationship, the one we have with ourselves. |
- Allan Lokos, "Cooling Emotional Fires"
Read the entire article in the Tricycle Wisdom Collection
Read the entire article in the Tricycle Wisdom Collection
Friday, February 3, 2012
Via JMG: JC Penney: We Stand With Ellen
The American Family Association's campaign against JC Penney and Ellen DeGeneres has earned the AFA scornful media attention from around the world. For their part, JC Penney says they are proudly "standing behind our partnership with Ellen DeGeneres." Here's how E! covered the story last night.
RELATED: GLAAD is wisely capitalizing on the situation to point out that LGBT people can be fired just for being who they are in 29 states across the nation. ENDA!
Reposted from Joe
Via JMG: On Husbands
About seven years ago JMG wrote this:
When gay marriage finally becomes widespread, how quickly (if at all) will we act to correct each other when we identify someone's significant other?It took almost seven years, but this very thing happened to me last night as I was rather archly informed that the couple I'd referred to as "husbands" were not married. They've just lived together for 22 years.
"There goes David and his husband."
"Oh, they aren't married, just living together."
Will we do that? Will we give those who choose not to marry a verbal downgrade to "just living together", to "just boyfriends"? Gay people have traditionally operated fast and loose with the rules of defining and naming our relationships.
Will there be a sense of relief then, as we convert to straight society's hierarchy of relationships and start identifying couples as: dating, living together, or married? I think that the implied legitimacy of a legal marriage will tempt many of our people to begin resorting relationships into those separate categories. And I don't know how I feel about that.
F%$k that, they are husbands.
Via Gay Politics Report: Washington state Senate OKs marriage equality
- Washington state Senate OKs marriage equality
- The Washington state Senate voted 28-21 in favor of a marriage equality bill Wednesday night, sending the legislation to the House of Representatives, where it's broadly supported. The bipartisan vote came after a speech by openly gay state Sen. Ed Murray, who promised to invite his colleagues -- including those who oppose the bill -- when he weds his partner of 20 years. "Those of us who support this legislation are not, and we should not be accused of, undermining family life or religious freedom. ... Marriage is how society says you are a family," Murray said. House passage of the bill is expected soon, and Gov. Christine Gregoire has vowed to sign it into law.
- SeattlePI.com (2/1), The Seattle Times (2/2), Towleroad (2/2)
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