A personal blog by a graying (mostly Anglo with light African-American roots) gay left leaning liberal progressive married college-educated Buddhist Baha'i BBC/NPR-listening Professor Emeritus now following the Dharma in Minas Gerais, Brasil.
Friday, January 13, 2023
Via Dhamma Wheel | Right Living: Abstaining from Misbehaving Among Sensual Pleasures
RIGHT LIVING Undertaking the Commitment to Abstain from Misbehaving Among Sensual Pleasures
Sensual misconduct is
unhealthy. Refraining from sensual misconduct is healthy. (MN 9)
Abandoning sensual misconduct, one abstains from misbehaving among
sensual pleasures. (MN 41) One practices thus: "Others may engage in
sensual misconduct, but I will abstain from sensual misconduct." (MN 8)
A person reflects thus: "If someone were to commit adultery with my
partner, that would not be pleasing and agreeable to me. Now if I were
to commit adultery with the partner of another, that would not be
pleasing and agreeable to the other. How can I inflict on another what
is displeasing and disagreeable to me?" Having reflected thus, one
abstains from sexual misconduct, exhorts others to abstain from it, and
speaks in praise of abstinence from it. (SN 55.7)
Reflection
The practical
definition of the precept against sexual misbehavior is defined in the
context of householder or layperson life as fidelity or honesty in
relationships. When an intimate partnership (of any gender combination)
involves a mutual promise of exclusivity, this is to be respected.
Cheating involves causing hurt and not being truthful, both of which are
inherently unhealthy and harmful.
Daily Practice
Relationships
are a rich area for daily practice. This text invites us to explore the
application of the Golden Rule in relationships, in both large and small
ways. It emphasizes that a pledge of fidelity works both ways and that
there are also countless minor instances of abuse of trust and integrity
that can come under the gaze of awareness. Look to see if there is
anything you do, however small, that you would not want your partner to
do.
Tomorrow: Developing Unarisen Healthy States One week from today: Abstaining from Intoxication
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