Via Daily Dharma

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Real Independence | December 28, 2014

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Real independence is the result of reflection and disciplined, honorable behavior.

- Bhikkhu Nyanasobhano, "The Phone Rings"

Via FB:

Two Gay Dads, Two Kids, A Normal Family

Via Liberal America: A Letter To My Boyfriend’s Homophobic Parents On Christmas

Congratulations. You’ve won. You’ve earned your ticket into Heaven by showing your son God’s love.

You’ve shown your son God’s love by not allowing him to bring me to your home for Christmas. You’ve done exactly what Jesus would do – shun others. After all, Jesus didn’t let JUST ANYONE at his table. It’s sad that on a day you celebrate the birth of Christ, you’ll be acting in the complete opposite way that Jesus acted. Alas, you must show your son God’s love and not condone “our behavior.”

It worked last Christmas. You manipulated him into coming home and he was treated as if he were a leper. He was called names, harassed, and told he was going to Hell because I was dragging him there myself. He was in mental anguish over your treatment of him. You tore him apart with your words. 

You degraded your only son.

But this Christmas….. He’s over it. He’s over the threats, the lies, and the bullying. Since you don’t recognize him and I as a couple and since you’ve said you won’t treat us like part of the family, he’s decided to choose love over hate this Christmas. He’s choosing to NOT go back to what he once called home. His home is with me and it has been for three years. He’s become an integral part of my family. While you were shunning your son away, he found a family of his own. He found people who love him without conditions. He found a table he was welcome at.

During your Christmas celebration when you try to justify your actions, please remember that you gave your son an ultimatum – for him to get rid of the love of his life or to leave your family. I know you blame me for taking your son away, but whether I’m in the picture or not, your son is still gay and you must face this realization.

You’ve made it abundantly clear that you think I’m demon-possessed, a bad influence, and a sinner. Your judgment of me has no effect, but your treatment of your son causes my heart to bleed. I’ve had to sit by and watch you throw stones at the person I love most. I’ve watched as you and the rest of his family have disowned him. I’ve thought of every scenario to get you to love your son again. I’ve blamed myself because I felt as if I personally caused him to lose his family. I know this isn’t the case and that your son chose me because he recognized true love. I’m writing this to say that I have your son’s love and that’s all that matters. Your son and I love each other and that love is eternal and unconditional.

While you’re feeling comforted knowing that you’ll be rewarded in the next life for “not condoning the gay lifestyle”, I’m consoling your son in THIS LIFE. I’m the shoulder your son cries on today. I’m the person who will hug him tight tomorrow. I’m the one who will apologize on your behalf until the day I die. I’m the one who wants to scream at you and say, “Stop! You’re hurting your son! 

You’re hurting your only son!” But deep down, I know where your heart lies. Your heart beats to that of a literal interpretation of the Bible. Your heart beats to Fox News. Your heart beats to discrimination and treating other “sinners” the way you think they should be treated – condemned to Hell. Your heart beats with hatred to the things you fear and do not understand.

This Christmas, your son and I are surrounding ourselves with people who love and care about us. We understand what true love is. So this Christmas when you think to yourselves, “He’s abandoned his family for the gay lifestyle,” just know that your son didn’t abandon you. He’s been the same person he’s always been. You are the ones who changed. You’ve deemed certain people unworthy to sit at your table. You’ve put conditions on your love for your son and that is the worst Christmas gift of all.

Caleb Woods is a Communications and English major. He is a reader, a writer, and an activist for LGBT rights, women’s rights, and the rights of the American people. He has lived in Alabama for his entire life and has experienced first-hand discrimination and bigotry. He hopes to change hearts and minds across the world so that people may show more compassion and empathy for their fellow man and woman.

Make the jump here to read the original

Via Daily Dharma

From Disillusionment to Renunciation | December 27, 2014 For the mind that is ripe and self-reflective, affluence undermines its own false promises, and many Westerners have come to Buddhism from disillusionment in the successful pursuit of worldly gratification. That disillusionment is the first phase of renunciation. - David Patt, "Who's Zoomin' Who? The Commodification of Buddhism in the American Marketplace"

Flor do Dia - Flor del Día - Flower of the Day - 27/12/2014

“A entrega espiritual em é um fenômeno que se dá através da Graça. O ego não é capaz de se entregar; ele é capaz de preparar o campo, de se mover em direção à entrega, mas a entrega em si é um fenômeno que está além dos domínios da mente e do ego. Ela ocorre quando o ego amadureceu o suficiente para poder relaxar e diminuir o controle a ponto de dar um cochilo. Nesse momento, Deus pega.”

“La entrega espiritual es un fenómeno que se da a través de la Gracia. El ego no es capaz de entregarse; él es capaz de preparar el terreno, de moverse hacia la entrega, pero la entrega en sí es un fenómeno que está más allá de los dominios de la mente y del ego. Ella ocurre cuando el ego madureció lo suficiente como para poder relajarse y disminuir el control al punto de adormecerse. En ese momento, Dios te toma.”

“Spiritual surrender is a phenomenon that takes place through divine grace. The ego is not capable of surrendering. It can prepare the inner field and move us towards surrender, but actual surrender is a phenomenon beyond the mind and the ego. It takes place when the ego is mature enough to relax and let go of its control to the point where it dozes off. That is when God catches hold of you.”

- Sri Prem Baba

Via Karen's Thoughts: Nourishing Rage and Letting It Go

He abused me, he beat me, he defeated me, he robbed me – in those who harbor such thoughts hatred will never cease.

This verse, at the very beginning of the Dharmapada, speaks of the very simple truth that if we bring to mind our wrongs and nourish our hurt and anger, we make ourselves miserable. This verse caught my attention a long time ago, because that is exactly what the mind does--it repeats the list of the wrongs someone else has done to us: “He did this. She did that.” followed by your favorite four-letter word for people you dislike. Like a bulldog with a bone, the mind chews on hurtful events over and over again.

Another Buddhist scripture speaks of revenge being like trying to throw a hot coal at an enemy, we burn ourselves before we even have a chance to hurt anyone else. Someone who says “I will never forgive!” is really saying that they will nurse their grudge internally and turn it around and around in their mind, making themselves feel terrible, while the object of their hatred is untouched – this is assuming one is not planning to break the law by doing violence, which leads to its own cycle of suffering.

Now, I'm not so perfect that I've never nursed a grievance. There's a huge amount of energy in anger and you feel like you're going to explode if you don't do something with it. I tend to talk about it until I run myself to a stop. During domestic arguments, I do housework --- the place is never so clean as when I'm rolling on a big internal rant. Ideally, one should use that energy to resolve that situation. I had something happen at work that was unjust, and I used that anger to solve the problem in a professional way, then poof! Anger all gone. Sometimes, I find what's under the anger is essentially anxiety – and knowing that doesn't make it go away necessarily, but it does give me a tool to fight it with. Because., as the Buddha makes clear, it's your own anger that's the real enemy, not the person you're raging about.

It's hard to let go. I sometimes hang on to the illusion that if I can only just explain how they hurt me, they'd understand and admit they were wrong. And let's be honest with ourselves: There is something pleasurable about the idea that we can have the last word and put someone in their place. We fantasize about it. I think that the next time a doctor asks me if I eat French fries when I've come in to have an ingrown toenail treated, I will tell him exactly what I think of him and his stereotyping, and I will stomp out of his office, numbed toe and all! (And I've eaten French fries less than a half-dozen times in the last ten years. Bastard!) Anyway, it's a very satisfying picture to think that you can let 'em have it and leave them speechless as you storm out the door.

But that usually doesn't happen. People aren't “put in their place”; they just defend and justify themselves, and do their best to put you in the wrong. The more you try it, the worse the conflict becomes. The more you justify yourself, the more ammunition you give to someone who wants to put you down. In my experience, the only way to really end any conflict is absence and stubborn silence. It takes two to fight. Nobody can keep a fight going by themselves, except in their own minds.

Probably the best tool in your arsenal for that mental fight is the practice of metta (loving-kindness) meditation. It really is the opposite of the “He wronged me” rant quoted from the Dharmapada. Instead what you do is say phrases like “May he be happy. May he be healthy. May he be safe. May he be at peace.” You can google metta and find a wide variation on the theme, but the basic idea is that we start with wishing ourselves well, then those who are close to us, then in ever-widening circles until we embrace the entire world with loving-kindness. But included in this practice are those wishes for those who “we have difficulty loving” or “a person that we find difficult”. If I stop and think about it, I don't really want anything bad to happen to a person who has made me angry. What I want, mostly, is for them to leave me alone – and if I keep stewing about what they've done, it's just a way of keeping them in my life. Ideally, one should be able to endure obnoxious people and still wish them well, but I'm not that saintly yet. One step at a time. :-)

Read the original Here

DrRic Tutorial 4-7-8 Breathing

See also:  http://www.drweil.com/drw/u/ART00521/three-breathing-exercises.html

Flor do Dia - Flor del Día - Flower of the Day - 26/12/2014

“Uma coisa é achar que tem fé; outra coisa é ter fé. Você acha que tem fé, mas isso é imaginação – é uma fé mental. Essa fé é construída a partir de uma interpretação intelectual do conhecimento espiritual. Essa falsa fé é apenas um truque da natureza inferior, pois ela desmorona diante do primeiro desafio que aparece. A autêntica fé é um fenômeno que se dá no plano do coração, e quando essa conexão é estabelecida, pode vir o balanço que for - você não cai. Este é o poder da fé: sendo autêntica ela faz o cego enxergar, surdo ouvir e manco subir montanha. Essa é a minha experiência.”

“Una cosa es creer que se tiene fe; otra cosa es tener fe. Crees que tienes fe, pero eso es imaginación - es una fe mental. Esta fe es construida a partir de una interpretación intelectual del conocimiento espiritual. Esta falsa fe es sólo un truco de la naturaleza inferior, pues ella se desmorona ante el primer desafío que aparece. La auténtica fe es un fenómeno que se da en el plano del corazón, y cuando se establece esa conexión, puede venir la dificultad que sea - tú no caes. Este es el poder de la fe: siendo auténtica ella hace al ciego ver, al sordo oír y al cojo subir la montaña. Esa es mi experiencia.”

“It’s one thing to think you have faith, and another to actually have faith. We may think we have faith, but it’s only in our imagination – a mental faith. This faith is based on an intellectual interpretation of spiritual knowledge. False faith is merely a trick played on us by our lower nature. It falls apart as soon as the first challenge appears. Authentic faith is a phenomenon that occurs in our heart. Once this connection is made, regardless of what comes to shake us up we never fall. That is the power of faith. When faith is authentic, it makes the blind see, the deaf hear and the lame climb mountains. That’s my experience.”

- Sri Prem Baba

Via Daily Dharma

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See the Suffering | December 26, 2014

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By paying attention to sensory experience as it is happening—and not getting caught up in the labels, preferences, thoughts, and emotions that happen in the split seconds after bare sense-data impinge on our awareness—we learn to see the suffering involved in getting caught up. And by seeing that suffering, we learn to free ourselves from it.

- Cynthia Thatcher, "Disconnect the Dots"

Via Freedom to Marry / FB:

Via Healing Light / FB:

Via Daily Dharma

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Spirituality Among Family | December 25, 2014

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Manifesting a spiritual practice with our family is extremely difficult, but it’s also really simple. We don’t get carried away by our emotions; we don’t affirm our position at the expense of where others are coming from. But we do our best to open our arms, open our heart, and let what we've got inside us flow out into the situation and let the situation outside flow into us. In that process, we lose ourselves.

- Shozan Jack Haubner, "Drama or Dharma"

Via Just a Bahai: Uganda's anti-gay laws get tougher

In this interview (http://www.aol.com/…/ugandas-anti-gay-laws-get-to…/21003022/) with a Ugandan Gay rights campaigner - one thing he said was "that we need to get religious leaders that are very progressive to also engage in Uganda" - this was in reference to the influence of conservative American Christian groups who had been hosting anti-gay conferences (see: http://en.wikipedia.org/…/Uganda_Anti-Homosexuality_Act,_20…). We are talking about human beings being murdered by mobs as David Kato was (see my blog -http://justabahai.wordpress.com/2011/01/27/we/). The 2014 Uganda Anti-Homosexuality Act, (it was called the "Kill the Gays bill" until the proposed death penalty clauses were removed), allows for life imprisonment for someone who is declared gay or lesbian. When it was passed, world leaders such as the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights, various Presidents, and religious leaders voiced their protest. The Vatican legal attaché to the United Nations made this statement: "Pope Benedict is opposed to 'unjust discrimination' against gay men and lesbians" (ibid)

On 1 August 2014, the Constitutional Court of Uganda ruled the law invalid because it didn't have the required quorum, and now the interview discusses a new bill that is being promoted by the Ugandan government. I hope that the UHJ's 2010 letter urging the Bahai community to stand up for the rights of those who are oppressed one day bears fruit. I have yet to read or to hear of a single Bahai community making any form of statement in support of human rights for gays and lesbians. I am not suggesting that Bahai communities should get involved in the politics of the day, but like the Vatican statement, it could show a stand against discrimination. In Uganda, most would think the Bahais were against gays and lesbians because of their past involvement in an anti-gay coalition: to undo that, the Bahai community would need to show in deeds that it is against any form of discrimination. But Bahai communities around the world need to show this too, because the only things on the topic of homosexuality that Bahai communities to date have publicized is to diminish the rights of gays and lesbians. How hard would it be for a Bahai community in any other country in the world to make a statement against discrimination against gays and lesbians? Looking the other way, saying nothing, is .... like letting the elephant keep its foot on the tail of the mouse. I thank God for countries around the world who do something about the plight of gays and lesbians and accept them as refugees.

http://www.aol.com/article/2014/12/04/ugandas-anti-gay-laws-get-tougher/21003022/

Flor do Dia - Flor del Día - Flower of the Day - 24/12/2014

“Jesus é um mestre a quem muitos milagres foram atribuídos. Dizem que ele ressuscitou mortos, transformou água em vinho, multiplicou alimentos e fez cegos enxergarem. Mas isso é pequeno perto do maior milagre que ele realizou; é apenas um jogo para acordar a fé das pessoas. Às vezes somente milagres como esse (que transcendem os limites da mente) podem acabar com o sonho do ceticismo. Porém, o maior milagre de Jesus foi amar e perdoar até mesmo aqueles que o crucificaram. Esse é o verdadeiro milagre: a superação do ódio, da vingança e do medo; é compreender que o ataque, os maus tratos e o ódio do outro são, na verdade, gritos de socorro.”

Confira o satsang completo: http://www.sriprembaba.org/pt-br/satsang/160914

“Jesús es un maestro a quien se le atribuyeron muchos milagros. Dicen que él resucitó muertos, transformó agua en vino, multiplicó alimentos e hizo a los ciegos ver. Pero esto es pequeño cerca del mayor milagro más grande que él realizó, es sólo un juego para despertar la fe de las personas. A veces solo milagros como éste (que trascienden los límites de la mente) pueden terminar con el sueño del escepticismo. Sin embargo, el mayor milagro de Jesús fue amar y perdonar incluso a aquellos que lo crucificaron. Este es el verdadero milagro: la superación del odio, de la venganza y del miedo; es comprender que el ataque, el maltrato y el odio son, en realidad, gritos de socorro.”

“Many miracles were attributed to the master Jesus. They say that he resuscitated the dead, turned water into wine, multiplied food and made the blind see. But that is nothing when compared to the greatest of all his miracles... These other miracles were just a play, meant to awaken people’s faith. Sometimes only miracles like these, which transcend the limits of the mind, can put an end to the illusion of skepticism. Jesus’ biggest miracle was loving and forgiving even the ones who crucified him. This is the true miracle: overcoming hate, revenge and fear, and understanding that the other’s attacks, abuse and hate are all merely cries for help.”

- Sri Prem Baba

Via Daily Dharma

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The Psychology of Awakening | December 24, 2014

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In its ability to shine light into the hidden nooks and crannies of our conditioning, psychological inquiry can serve as a powerful ally to spiritual practice. It can help break up the hard, rocky soil of our personality patterns so that this soil becomes permeable, allowing the seeds of spiritual realization to take root and blossom there more fully.

- John Welwood, "The Psychology of Awakening"

Via JMG: SCOTUS To Consider Four More Marriage Cases At January Conference

 

 

We already know about Louisiana and now four more have been added. Via Chris Geidner at Buzzfeed:

The Supreme Court is set to consider on Jan. 9 whether it will hear appeals of same-sex couples’ marriage challenges in cases out of five states, one of the legal teams representing the couples told BuzzFeed News on Monday. “The Tanco [Tennessee case] petition will be considered at the Court’s January 9 conference, along with … petitions filed by the plaintiffs in Michigan, Ohio, Kentucky, and Louisiana,” National Center for Lesbian Rights spokesperson Erik Olvera told BuzzFeed News on Monday afternoon. The plaintiffs and marriage equality advocates alike hope the petitions will provide the Supreme Court with the chance to take a case to resolve the issue nationally with a ruling that would apply across the country.

More from SCOTUSblog:

At issue in the Sixth Circuit cases is a ruling by the appeals court for that region, upholding all of the bans on same-sex marriage licensing or recognition in the four states. At issue in the Louisiana case is a decision by a federal trial judge in New Orleans upholding that state’s ban on licensing and recognition. If the Court takes an initial vote on the cases, on the question of granting or denying review, when it returns in January from a winter recess, and ultimately grants review, the cases could be scheduled for briefing, oral argument, and a final decision in the current Term, which runs through late June or early July. The distribution of the four Sixth Circuit cases for the January 9 Conference is not yet reflected on the Court’s electronic docket, but is expected to be entered there on Tuesday. The docket does reflect that scheduling for the Louisiana case.

Labels: Kentucky, LGBT rights, Louisiana, marriage equality, Michigan, Ohio, SCOTUS, Tennessee

Reposted from Joe Jervis

Tide commercial / advertisement with a Gay Couple

Via JMG: MAP: Our Historic Year For Marriage

 

Embiggen the above map from Freedom To Marry and marvel at this year's progress. As seen in the graphic below, even more action is coming early in 2015.

Labels: 2014 In Review, marriage equality, United States

Reposted from Joe Jervis